Adolescent

21.

I took a deep breath as I stepped up to the door that separated my room from the foyer-type room that connected Hayden, Sam and Cade's rooms to mine. I was still trying to coach myself into the biggest façade I'd ever tried to pull off. It wasn't easy, but nothing was anymore.

I leaned my head against the door.

Please. You can do this. Look happy. Pretend like your insides don't feel like they're being put through a woodchipper while still attached to you. Pretend to be okay.

With that, I put on a smile and pushed the door open.

****

About two hours and three s'mores-flavored cappuccinos later, I'd written the lyrics and part of the melodies of a song with the lead singer of one of my favorite bands. It went a little something like this:

As we fade to black

I'm still running for my life
The realization is setting in
This horror film I've been residing in
Has become my life
(Oh, no.)
(SPOKEN:) Someone cut this damn camera off!

I can't get off this movie set
I'm forever trapped
Forced to live onstage
And now I look behind
No longer blind
The monster's still chasing me

Freddie, Jason, Chucky, Scream
They're all after me
But here's a plot twist that'll knock ya dead
They all live inside my head
It isn't a lie when they say we have demons

I can't get off this movie set
I'm forever trapped
Forced to live onstage
And now I look behind
No longer blind
The monster's still chasing me
It's all inside my head

Now here's the climax
Certainly do or die
It's fight or flight
Heart beating with all its might
I might as well be dead
It's bearing down on me
Impending catastrophe
The figure rears its ugly head
My chest locks with fear
As it starts to near
Even more
Closer and closer and closer
I get a look at it
Screams ring in the barren pit
I'm staring back at myself
I'm the demon
And it's all, it's all inside my head

"I know it's a little dark for your style now, but maybe we could do a little reminiscing of Cinematics with the melodies," I said to Cody. I picked up a cello from the vast array of instruments we were surrounded by. "And maybe it could be underlied with something like this."

I began to play a choppy, dark melody that'd been in my mind since we'd finished the lyrics and main lyric melodies. It'd been a while since I'd played a cello, and I was surprised I didn't fumble with it - even with my own composition.

"Oh yeah. We could definitely catch the vibe of the lyrics with a lot of dark classical strings along with the bass and guitar," he said. He picked up a plugged in guitar and played my melody along with me.

Soon, we had the classical strings down and were working on guitar and bass. After that, we were getting percussion and piano. Soon, we had a song that we both were pretty damn proud of. We listened to the closing chords and Cody held his hand up for a high five. I slapped it.