In Her Eyes ✔~ trixya

An Evening In Our Park

Katya had searched all morning for her lover, but there was no sign of her until the early evening when she was about to make her way back home. It was in the park Katya found Trixie, somehow it was always the park which brought them together in one way or another. And when Katya saw the beautiful girl walking there by herself, she instantly thought back to the day when she had first appeared in women's clothing and to the acceptance she had found in Trixie's eyes. Now instead, she found sorrow and anger in them as soon as Trixie noticed her, the girl instantly turning to walk away, causing Katya to run after her.

"Trixie, wait!" Katya called out.

"What is it, Katya? I thought I had made myself quite clear when I left."

"Please!" Katya begged, grabbing hold of Trixie's wrist to stop her. "I know what I did wrong and I am sorry I did not listen before. I know you are with child, and I want you to know that I wish to provide for you both."

"And how exactly was it you came to learn of my condition?" Trixie said as she turned towards her, seeming to have grown more cross after Katya's last sentence.

"My mother came to see me and told me of the news, and she made me realize how foolish I had been." Katya told her honestly.

"Oh, I see. So your mother can get through to you, but you ignore the pleas of your lover without hesitation... even when she is clearly desperate for you to listen." Trixie spat.

"Trixie, please I-"

"It's too late, Katya. Don't you see? I have given you chance after chance, but you refused to listen every time, and now I have no more chances to give." Trixie said in a softer tone as she put her basket of shopped goods down next to her.

"Please, I can change! I swear it!" Katya insisted.

"No, you cannot change, Katya! Believe you me, if you could change any part of you, we would not be having this conversation now. Do you honestly still not see our issue?" Trixie asked, the idea of Katya still being so in the dark in regards to their predicament seeming almost unfathomable. "You are complete, Katya. Even when you are all alone and on your own, you are complete. Whilst I am unfinished... with or without you. I have needed you time and time again, but you are fine on your own. You don't need me as I do you."

"That's incorrect, I needed you and you left!"Katya said as she let the pain of her heartbreak turn into anger once again.

"Because there was no room for me! You keep acting as if I have done these things with the goal of hurting you, when I only left because you left me with no other choice but do so. I... I need to think about my child now, not just myself.."

"Our child." Katya corrected.

"My child. It is not yours, and I will swear that to the grave should I be questioned about it. I cannot let my child depend on someone who refuses to be present." Trixie said harshly.

"You would rob me of the chance to know my own child?" Katya asked in shock.

"I have robbed you of nothing, all that blame which you wish to aim at me you may place on yourself, for it is you and you alone who caused this, Katya. I wanted a life with you, that was all I ever wanted, but I had to open my eyes and realize that I would always come second to your one true love; your paintings." Trixie said as a tear slowly fell down her cheek, the water glittering like a shimmering jewel against her porcelain skin. "I made my decision, it is done, and I will have to live with it. And I know it means that I shall never meet someone like you again, for truly, there is no one like you. But you shall also have to live with your decision, with your actions and choices, for Katya, there is no one else out there who is like me either. I gave you my everything, sacrificed more for you than most would, and I lived for far too long with the acceptance that you would never truly show that you appreciated it. But I will not let my child grow up begging for your love and attention like I have had to do."

"Trixie-"

"No, enough of this." Trixie interrupted as she picked up her basket. "No more. I can't do it... Goodbye, Katya. I wish you happiness, but I do not wish you to contact me after this. I am done, we are done, so please leave me be."

And with that Trixie walked away, disappearing amongst green trees and tall grass as she walked along the blue-green lake by the park which they had spent so much time in together. Katya walked away in the other direction, turning her back on the grass, and the trees, and the calm blue-green water.

And as they both walked away, there was one truth neither one could have known;
that it would be the last conversation the two of them would ever share.