It's Just Living | c.h

30- Please

A/n
Omg tests are bums... Seriously annoying bums.

Anyways! Hope you like the chapter <3

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"Honey do you need any pillows?" My mother calls up the stairs.

Ever since the accident my mother seems to think that I have completely lost any sense of movement in my body- leaving me bed bound. How wonderful. Note my sarcasm.

"No mum, I already have 4, I don't think I can get any comfier!" I shout back.

Picking up my glass of water, by the side of my bed, I take a large sip; my throat still hasn't recovered from the 'night'. Even though I left the hospital three days ago, my body still aches.

"Honey?" My mother shouts, again.

"Yes mother?" I impatiently reply.

My mothers head pokes around the doorway. She smiles sheepishly, "There is someone here for you."

Groaning I pull the covers over my head, "noo!" I feel the covers being pulled away from my body, exposing me. "I'm not seeing anyone!" I stubbornly moan, curling into a smaller ball to on my bare mattress.

"Ahh what a shame, I'll leave... Actually, I don't care- I'm here." Calum's voice makes my head perk up from the cocoon I had made with my body.

"What are you doing here?" I question, I can't believe he's in my room. Why is he in my room? Dammit, I forgot to clean my room... I don't care, it's my room. Wait, why is he in MY room?

"Wow, way to make someone feel welcome." Calum sarcastically retorts, sitting on my desk chair.

"Well, actually, you were never invited so you were never welcome." I say matter-of-factly sitting up in my bed.

"Enough of the facts, I just came round to check on you."

My eyes widen. What? He came to check on me? Me? Nooo! Me? What?

He chuckles at my reply of facial expressions but then stands up turning suddenly serious.

"You mean a lot to me, and I needed to check if everything was okay since coming out of the hospital." He walks slowly towards me but stops so he is only centimetres away from my face.

My heart rate picks up. "I have a phone." I look away from his intense gaze.

I hear him sigh but he doesn't move away.

"Why can't you forgive me?" His voice sounds broken and I'm sure if I was looking in his eyes my wall to defend myself from him would crumble. "Kate, please look at me."

I refuse to look into his eyes again, trying to stand my ground (whatever ground that is) but his hand reaches out and gently pulls my face so it's looking directly into his chestnut eyes.

"Please, forgive me." His voice sounds like it's drowning in pain and I'm the only one to and save him.

"I-" His eyes turn hopeful, "I can't." I pull away from him and stand up on the other side of my bed so there is a big space between us.

"Yes you can." His, once pained, voice turns determined laced with anger. "You know you can."

"I know!" I shout, trying to stop everything happening around me, it's too much. "I know Calum." My voice grows softer but I still feel a flame of anger and fear burn in the pit of my stomach.

Calum starts to walk around the bed to face me, but not stand as close as before.

"Stop building up walls around you and blocking people out Kate. You need to let someone in. You need to let me in... I'm not going to hurt you."

"But you already did." I whisper.

"And I would do anything to take that back, Kate, but I can't. So, either forgive me, or you can carry on living your life with no one to call your own."

Something hits me, and hard.

I don't block people out?

Do I?

I open my mouth to say something but no words come out, so I turn my head away from the boy in Starbucks and wait.

Wait for him to give up.

Wait for him to walk away.

Wait for him to close the door.

Wait for my soul to stitch back together because he just ripped it in half and threw away the glue.

"I'm not giving up on you Kate, you will forgive me, and I'm not stopping until you do."