Shameless (Jalex Fanfic)

Chapter 15: Just A Daydream Away

Alex POV:

We had to sneak around so much it hurt. I wanted to kiss him whenever I wanted. I wanted to crawl into his bunk at night when I got cold. I wanted to hold his hand on stage. I wanted to tell my boyfriend I loved him when he said something sweet. But I couldn't because Jack didn't want anyone to know.

We would sit in the bunks when no one was around and maybe share a few small kisses if we were sure no one was around. One night after the show Jack and I had snuck off behind some backstage equipment to 'talk'.

Jack's lips crashed into mine as soon as we were out of sight. His hands felt up my body tenderly yet eagerly. I ached for his touch. I wanted to be close to him again. It'd been forever since we were together.

His lips trailed my jaw and went down to my neck. He bit lightly making me gasp. He chuckled and I pushed him against this big metal box connecting our lips forcefully, making it shake.

"Shit," someone muttered from the other side of the box.

Jack looked at me terrified as the person came around to greet us. The equipment box was too tall for anyone to be seen over it. I quickly stepped away from Jack before the boy came into view. He was a little bit shorter than Jack but still taller than me. He wore a beanie but his hair was jet black with a turquoise streak in it like Jack's used to be when he was younger. He had an eyebrow piercing and small gages.

His eyes widened and he turned around, "I, uh, sorry. I'll just... sorry," he apologized awkwardly and went away.

Jack put his head back against the box, this time softly, "Do you think we knew it was me you were with? I was kinda behind you..."

I closed my eyes, "Yeah he probably knows."

Jack bit his lip, "Do you think he'll tell people?"

I shrugged, "N-No probably not. If I see him again I'll ask him not to."

He nodded while looking at his feet, "Yeah, okay."

"Why don't we tell people Jack?" I asked wrapping my arms around his torso and putting my head on his shoulder, "If we tell people then we won't have to sneak around or worry about people telling. It could be good."

"I just, I don't know if it's a good idea," he whispered into my hair.

"But why?" I asked him, my voice sounding small. I moved my head back so I could look into his eyes, "Are you embarrassed of me?"

"No!" he said quickly frowning, "I'm not embarrassed of you!"

"Then why don't you want to tell people about us?"

"I don't know, Alex. I just... Fuck." He didn't have an actual excuse. He just didn't.

My heart ached for us.

—-

A few nights after that Jack and I were sitting in the back lounge kind of cuddled up. My legs were draped over his and he played with my fingers as Home Alone played on the TV.

It was nice. This was the most contact we'd had on the tour bus with people in the other room. Rian and Zack were in the kitchen eating. Jack usually didn't even want to sit near me when they were on the bus. Even with the door closed.

I didn't understand him. Why did he make us so distant? Even on the other tours Jack and I were always on top of each other and cuddly and we were just friends then. If they didn't suspect anything then why would they now? It made no sense.

This moment I had with him was the closest we'd gotten in a while. I was cherishing it. I let my heart have the happiness for once. I let it make my whole body numb with love. I didn't care that we weren't telling people.

I just enjoyed his fingers intertwined with mine. And how he looked over at me to grin when his favorite part of the movie came on.

"I love you..." I mumbled quietly while looking into his chocolate eyes.

His smile widened, "I love you too." He leaned in and pressed his lips to mine softly and swiftly. Such a small kiss, but even then it sent my heart into a fit. I'd came to the realization that that was never going to go away.

He leaned his head back on the couch so he could focus on the movie yet again. I watched his reactions for a few moments before turning my attention back to the film myself.

The door behind us opened. I didn't move because the stuff we were doing, we would've done when we were only friends. Rian and Zack came around and sat down on the couch next to Jack and I. One on either side of us. Way to ruin my moment guys.

"Home Alone again?" Zack asked.

Jack silently nodded, still watching the movie he'd seen at least thirty times if not more. I noticed our hands that were intertwined seconds before were now a few inches apart by his doing.

"Don't you own anymore movies?" Rian complained.

"Shut up," Jack whined, eyes glued to the screen, "He's about to get hit with the paint." I half smiled at his childlike enthusiasm. He was so cute.

We watched in silence as the creepy home invaders were tricked by a child. A smart kid, I'd say. I would never have been able to pull something like that off.

When the credits started to roll Rian and Jack were arguing about which movie to watch next while Zack started to scroll through the movies on Netflix. I stood up, I needed to get some fresh air. I walked over to the window and opened it. There wasn't enough air coming into the window to actually let me breath because we were pulling into a gas station.

"Hey we're coming up on a gas station," Matt said with his head poked through the door.

"Yes," I smiled, "I have to get off this bus for at least a minute or two."

"Too early in the tour to feel that way, Alex," Jack said from the couch.

"You already know what would make it better," I took my stab at him and went on, "You guys want me to get anything for you?"

"Yes!" They all said and told me what they wanted, handing me an appropriate amount of money to go with it. I hopped off the bus and went into the store. The equipment van was stopped too.

I walked up to the candy aisle first. I grabbed the candy and snacks everyone told me to get and grabbed a ton for me too. After I made sure I hadn't forgotten anything I went over to the refrigerators. I quickly grabbed a ton of rock stars and monsters. A guy walked behind me, I looked at him. I recognized him. He was the guy who caught Jack and I the other night.

I turned and called out to him, "Hey, you!"

A/N: Idk if people read this or not but thanks if you do! Shout out to AmyLaFlamm for always voting! You're squad af :DD

So yeah! Vote and comment if you'd like.. not gonna force you or anything.

Until next time,

-H