Expect... unexpected.
To say „It's complicated" is like to say nothing. First's younger brother Fourth is in almost happy relationship with famous singer and definitely doesn't need any changes. Khaotung is F1 driver for Ferrari in his last year in...
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The following days passed quickly, maybe even too quickly, but that's how it is when you spend time in good company. First felt as if he had been born again. Thanks to Khaotung, he was bursting with energy again, got a good night's sleep, and even had his appetite back. They cooked together in a small kitchen in First's apartment, together they walked around the city (always in disguises and make-up, thanks to which passers-by paid attention to them, but no one could see the famous Khaotung Thanawat, a Formula 1 driver, in a young, black-haired a boy with blonde streaks and eyes lined with black eyeliner, and almost black lips, glasses, and lots of freckles), they would sit in the park together reading books, and they were happiest every morning when they woke up thinking they'd see each other again. Thanawat didn't want to give it up. And he couldn't even.
When he casually mentioned First to NuNew, NuNew immediately suspected that First Kanaphan might be one of the missing hybrids. At the Institute, everyone knew the story of the two missing brothers who disappeared the day the younger one was born, but could it be that First, this handsome and funny young man who had been through so much in his life, was the one his mother had been looking for for 19 years and never found? How would his life have turned out had he never disappeared? Would he be one of the Knights of the Light now, so they would have met much sooner? And could that have made Khaotung win the F1 championship earlier? Tung felt that if First had come into his life earlier, things would have been a little easier, though he didn't know what he was basing that belief on.
“I'll take you with me” Khaotung was stubborn. He played with the pen, looking at First, who was just drying his wet hair with a towel. They had gotten to know each other a bit over the past few days, and First had been fine with Khaotung spending the last two nights before returning to work for him. When he asked why he preferred sitting in a large but certainly less comfortable room than lounging on a comfortable bed in his hotel suite, he got the answer he might have expected. Tung simply stated that there was nothing important in this suite, namely First himself.
“In what role? You're not allowed to have a boyfriend” First replied sadly and was angry with himself for having the courage to imagine that someone so wonderful, funny, wonderful, charming and handsome would want him as a boyfriend, such a total zero without any greater achievements.
„You're an idiot, First!” —He yelled at himself mentally. — „What are you even thinking?! To be HIS boyfriend? This Khaotung Thanawat?! Have I completely lost my mind?! How could someone like him fall in love with someone like me? I'm a zero, I have nothing to offer except my company, my stupidity and my open, though heavily trampled, broken and unwanted heart. What can I give him in return? I can only clean and cook, but anyone can do that for him, besides... And if his fans found out about my past, his career would be over... No, I can't let that happen, and anyway, I bet he doesn't feel anything for me, I just imagined it all because I feel lonely”.
First really wanted to trust someone again, but a person who has been hurt so many times, who has always trusted everyone and that trust has been broken, can't trust anyone that easily anymore. Deep down, First wanted Khaotung to be the one to help him, to heal him, to give him hope for a better future and to help him move forward, but he never had the courage to believe in his dreams. He just had them. He imagined things, sometimes he dreamed something beautiful, but his own life had taught him that dreams rarely come true.
