youtuber x reader oneshots (REQUESTS CLOSED) book 1

lifesteal's incorrect quotes (x y/n)

just wanted to do this
ik most of my audience is smii7y/bbs but heres some lifesteal
go watch them

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y/n: Relationships should be 50/50. ro (roshambogames) cooks us dinner while I sit on the kitchen counter looking pretty.

spoke: Are you an F5 key? Because that ass is refreshing.
y/n: Are you a software update? because not right now

parrot: I owe you one.
y/n: That's ok. You can just date me and we'll call it even.

rekrap: I fell—
y/n: From heaven?
rekrap: No, I literally fell—
y/n: In love with me the moment you saw me?
rekrap: MY ARM IS BROKEN!
y/n: Okay, but do you think I'm pretty? Be honest.

y/n: I'm proud to identify as morosexual. I'm attracted to dumbasses and dumbasses exclusively. Someone asked me what the Spanish word for "tortilla" was once, and now I dream of kissing them under the moonlight.
branzy: What kind of animal is the Pink Panther?
y/n, already taking off their clothes: God, branzy, you're so fucking stupid.

clownpierce: y/n and I are no longer dating.
y/n: clown, that's a horrible way of telling people we're married.

subz: y/n, you love me, right?
y/n: Normally I'd say yes without hesitation, but I feel like this is going somewhere I won't like.

y/n: We're getting married, bitches!
vitalasy: And we're about to make it everybody else's problem.

reddoons: Okay, I'm going to get the wedding cake.
y/n: Perfect, while you do that I'll check on the ring bear.
reddoons: ...
reddoons: You mean ring bearER, right?
y/n: ...
reddoons: Look me in the eyes and tell me you are not going to bring a dangerous wild animal to our wedding.

y/n: How do I tell planet that I want them to yell at me like they're Gordon Ramsay and I'm a poor little chef who just ruined a crème brûlée?

bacon: Do you want to explain the text you sent me last night?
y/n: It was autocorrect.
bacon: Autocorrect wrote "You're so hot. Please step on me."?
y/n: Yes.

y/n: Okay, but what if we went to dinner not as friends this time?
jaron: AS ENEMIES?!
y/n:

y/n: Are you ready to commit?
spepticle: Like, a crime or a relationship?

y/n: The first time I saw you, you stole my heart.
ashswag: But I'm a kleptomaniac, so that doesn't mean anything.

y/n: My hands are cold.
princezam: Here, let me hold them.
y/n: My lips are cold too.
princezam: *covers y/n's mouth with their hand*

mapicc: I want to be with you for the rest of my life.
y/n: Damn, that sounds like a marriage proposal.
mapicc, getting down on one knee: That's 'cause it is.

y/n: I still have no idea how I'm attracted to you...
leo: Yeah, well, you're stuck with me, and no take backs, honey.

y/n: *angrily presses pangi against a wall* WHERE'S THE MONEY?!
pangi: ...
pangi: Are we about to kiss-

woogie: Did it hurt when you fell-
y/n: From heaven? Wow, I didn't think you were such a flirt-
woogie: No, I meant when you fell down the stairs.
y/n: ...
woogie: You just laid there for 15 minutes.

y/n: I can't take this anymore, someone needs to take me out!
midmystix: In a dating type of way, or an assassination type of way?
y/n: I don't know, surprise me!

((i love mid) also mid is a girl so gf imagine right here)

y/n: Is something burning?
vortex, leaning seductively on the counter: Just my desire for you.
y/n: vortex, the toaster is literally on fire.

terrain: Can I have 2 straws with that milkshake?
y/n: Aww-
terrain: With 2 straws, I can drink it double as fast!

bonus: CLOWNZY 😃

branzy: I am so cool. I am an absolute Chad. I am the epitome of coolness and awesomeness—
clown: Hi.
branzy: *melts down in a flustered heap of softness*

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thank you for 5k ill give you a frog house bf imagines soon <3