youtuber x reader oneshots (REQUESTS CLOSED) book 1

lifesteal x y/n (part 2)

someone wanted a part two

yippee

im going to go alphabetically

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ASHSWAGG

y/n: If there's going to be a big dramatic scene, wait until I get back.
ashswag: Of course. I can't flip this table by myself.

BACONWAFFLES

y/n, tending to bacon's wounds: How would you rate your pain?
bacon: Zero stars. Would NOT recommend.

BRANZYCRAFT

y/n: branzy and I have the kind of easy chemistry where we finish each other's-
branzy: Sentences!
y/n: Don't interrupt me.

CLOWNPIERCE

y/n: You know, I'm starting to regret showing you how that blender works.
clown, drinking toast: Why do you say that?

ITZSUBZ

y/n, pointing: May I sit there?
subz: That's my lap
y/n: That doesn't answer my question, subz.

LEOWOOK

y/n: Sorry it took me so long to bail you out of jail
leo: No it's my fault, I shouldn't've used my one phone call to prank call the police

MAPICC

y/n: God, give me patience.
mapic: I think you mean 'give me strength'.
y/n: If God gave me strength, you'd be dead.

MCCLUTCH

y/n: Are you an 'arr' pirate, or a 'yo ho ho' pirate?
clutch: I'm a 'I'm not paying $600 for photoshop' pirate.

MIDMYSTICX

y/n: I prevented a murder today.
mid: Really? How'd you do that?
y/n: self control.

MRCUBE

y/n: If you were to vacuum up jello through a metal tube, well I think that'd be a neat noise
mrcube: I beg to differ
y/n: Then Beg

PANGI

y/n: Here's some advice
pangi: I didn't ask for any???
y/n: Too bad. I'm stuck here with my thoughts and you're the only one who talks to me

PARROTX2

y/n: Must be hard not being able to laugh
parrot: I do have a sense of humor you know
y/n: I've never heard you laugh before
parrot: I've never heard you say anything funny

PLANETLORD

y/n: Oh just so you know, it's very muggy outside
planetlord:
planetlord: y/n, I swear, if I step outside and all of our mugs are on the front lawn...
y/n: *Sips coffee from bowl*

PRINCEZAM

y/n: zam, stop! This isn't you, you've gone mad with power!
zam: Well of course I have.
zam: Have you ever tried going mad without power?
zam: It's boring.

REDDOONS

y/n: Treat spiders the way you want to be treated.
reddoons: Killed without hesitation.
y/n: No.

REKRAP2

y/n: rekrap...
rekrap: Oh no, 'rekrap' in b-flat.
rekrap: You're disappointed.

ROSHAMBOGAMES

y/n, watching the news: Someone tried to fight a squid at the aquarium today!
ro: *walks in covered with ink* Well, maybe the squid was being a dick.

SPEPTICLE

y/n: petition to remove the 'd' from Wednesday
spep: Wednesay
y/n: Not what I had in mind, but I'm flexible

SPOKEISHERE

y/n: Someone will die.
spoke: Of fun!

THETERRAIN

y/n: I was thinking I'd do some magic-
terrain: You? Magic? y/n, it says talent show.

VITALASY

y/n: What is your biggest weakness?
vitalasy: I can be uncooperative.
y/n: Okay, can you give me an example?
vitalasy: No.

VORT3XDRAGON

y/n: Man, I only ever see you awake, do you ever shut down or stop running?
vortex: Oh, I'm always running
vortex: The question is from what

WOOGIEX

y/n: I know you're deflecting by making jokes about how hot you are.
woogie: It's not a joke.
woogie: *sniffles*
woogie: I'm a legit snack.

YEAH_JARON

y/n: I think I'm having a mid-life crisis.
jaron: You're like 18 years old
y/n: I MIGHT DIE AT 30!
jaron: You can't even math
y/n: SHUT UP!!

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i love this shit

ahahahahahah