AMBRE:
I press my palm to my aching head as I park my car in my driveway. I slip my heels off and head towards my house. I sluggishly swing my purse. left, right, left, right. I reach inside my purse for my keys when I hear a commotion behind the do...
"Ambre! Look at my drawing!" Aimee ran up to me as I lounged on our hammock ,a portrait of someone in her hands. I smiled gleefully at her. "Is this me?" She nodded enthusiastically and blew a kiss to me. "Oh I love it so much Aimee!" I made sure to squeal so she knew just how happy her gift had made me. She beamed down at me, handed me the portrait and ran back to Zena. They held hands and skipped ahead of Aliane and Alizee who were taking them to the ice cream shop down the block. Ezra lay beside me on the hammock his arms draped across my hip and my head laid on his other arm.
He must have been uncomfortable but would pull me back into the same position whenever I moved, trying to not make his arm fall asleep. "Stay right here I want to feel u against me" he whispered into my ear my heart swells and raced with happiness. The sun was beginning to hang low in the sky. I could hear Zena and Aimee playing tag as they headed back. "I'm so happy to call you my fiance, and soon my wife." Ezra's voice was low and sweet, his breath tickled my neck and it made me giggle.
"I am happy to call you my fiance as well and soon my husband." I clasped our hands together and intertwined our fingers. "I love you" I whispered to him. Aimee and Zena ran around the corner and through the gates big smiles on their faces and their ice cream cones half-eaten and melting on their hands. Aliane and Alizee walked around the corner each holding a flower in their hand. They took a few sniffs and then they would smile a small sad smile. Aliane held a statice flower and Alizee held a mums flower. My heart suddenly felt full. Full of happiness yet grave sadness.
Statice Flower
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These flowers are deer resistant very vibrant and they signify fond memories in many people.
Mums flower
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Mums flowers, also referred to as Chrysanthemums are one of the popular fall garden flowers grown in Kenya. They symbolize different things such as respect, honor, sympathy, and life.
These flowers used to be a part of our mother's birthday cards and mothers Day gifts every year because our dad always wanted to make mom happy and feel at home. They symbolized a part of her because these flowers grew in her backyard when she was little and lived in Kenya. She had a Chrysanthemum brooch but died before she could give it to me. I wasn't sure where any of her belongings were anymore.
When she passed, our father would sell little pieces of her belongings. Little by little until it was all gone. Leaving him empty, yet full, and Drowning in alcohol. As Alizee and Aliane walked over to us I sat up. French: "Fleurs de mamans"//English: "Moms flowers." Alizee handed me her Chrysanthemums flower and smiled at me, a small tear falls down her left cheek and she wipes it away. "Tomorrow will be Mamans birthday and we know how close you were with her and how badly it hurts you to remember her but we want to celebrate it. We want to remember Maman." Her voice was shaky and I knew that I too had tears rolling down my face.
I spoke calmly so that my voice wouldn't shake. "I love maman very much and if you guys want to do this then we will! It only just hurts so much sometimes that I would just rather forget it all but we will do it differently now. We will make all her favorite foods and buy all her favorite drinks and we will listen to all her favorite music! I love you all so much and even Anais. We will wake up early to buy everything we need so there will never be a dull moment tomorrow. How's that sound?" Alizee and Aliane nodded, their silver hoop earrings dangling.
Ezra held on to me as Alizee and Aliane went inside. I shook vigorously holding the sob that was threatening to break me from the inside out suppressed. "It's okay to let it out Ambre, sometimes holding it all in and trying to keep up a facade of being okay only hurts your progress." Ezra's voice was calm and soothing, only making it harder for me to hold in the tears. I tried for a little longer to hold it in but I couldn't the tear started to side down my face and the sobs started. Loud at first and then quieter until they only became whimpers. Ezra held onto me as if his life depended on it. Letting me know that he could always be there to hold me whenever I needed.
I began to call everyone in my contacts to come to our mother's birthday bash even tho it was on very short notice many people agreed to show up. Ebony and Mason were going to show up because they lived pretty close and Zena was here. They were going to bring another guest along! This made me excited and a surge of adrenaline and energy hummed through my body. I wasn't going to get any sleep tonight and Ezra sighed a little knowing what was running through my mind. If I wasn't going to sleep then he wasn't either. I hopped up and ran to grab my journal. The planning has begun.
"We need food and drinks and we need decorations and more statices and chrysanthemums! Stat!" I called out excitedly while pointing my pen to Ezra. "Babe it's 8:00 pm how are we gonna do this?" Ezra already seemed a little deflated solely based on the time crunch we had. I chuckled at his incredulous expression. "Ezra we are in California and Its only 8:00 pm we can get so much done! We have the funds we just have to go crazy!" I expressed delightedly. He relaxed visibly then he also became excited. "Ok let's do this!" His voice cracked and I could hear Aimee dying of laughter at the front door.
Her head popped out, then Zina and then Alizee's and Aliane's. I laughed and beckoned them Forward. "Come guys get in the car! Let's start getting things together."
