A pair of Katanas

ebb and flow

I had gone five weeks without seeing Leo. Ever since the incident a slew of missions and new leads had been popping up and our plans kept getting cancelled. It was frustrating, and my anxiety was at an all time high; intrusive thoughts and serial overthinking plaguing my mind at all hours of the day. Talk about attachment issues.

To fix this I started attending courses at my local community college, the type you could attend for a small fee and get a certificate once completed. I took an introductory course to accounting. Maybe the numbers would drown out the voices in my head. Besides, if I ever decided to take a full time degree in business or finance, it come come in handy. At least that's what I told Dad when probed me about my sudden interest in  high finance.

"You know, other kids your age would be up three hours later and out having a fun afternoon at the park with their friends during the last few weeks of their break." Dad looked at me over his newspaper, a twinkle in his eyes.

It was a bleak Monday morning, and the two of us were at the dining table having  quick breakfast before leaving the house together- him to go to work; me to attend a class.

"Mhm" I said, severely lacking any willpower to sustain a conversation at 7am in the morning.

                                           ~

My morning commute was a sort of refuge for me these days, now that I hadn't seen Leo in a hot minute. There was something special about plugging your ears and letting the beats of your favourite music take control as you strut down the pavements, get squished in the underground, devour a burrito from a stand right outside your college. It romanticised the mundane, and I didn't have to deal with any pesky thoughts.

I made my way to class, burrito in one hand and my laptop in the other only to find someone in my usual seat upon arrival.

He had dark wavy hair that was a touch too long, olive skin and a lanky but well-built frame. I couldn't deny the fact he was just my type, but I did try to resist the thought. Regardless, I made my way over, and placed my stuff down a seat apart from his. He looked up from his pre-lecture reading material, took out an earbud and offered me a bashful half-smile. I smiled awkwardly back, trying hard to not stare into his green eyes a second too long.

"Those burritos are great" he commented. "My grandma is Mexican, and they're the only ones she gave a 10, apart from hers."

"Oh, yeah" I replied, trying to seem confident. "And convenient."

"I'm Eric" he stretched out a hand. "I've never seen you here before."

"Y/n" I shook it, hoping my palms weren't sweaty. "I've never been able to wake up for morning classes before."

He chuckled, and before I had to be subjected to further early-morning-human-interaction, our professor walked in and the class commenced shortly after.

Despite my valiant attempts to pay attention my mind kept going back to that night. The last night I had seen Leo.Somehow economic indicators and the case study  of the 2008 recession we were supposed to be analysing wasn't enough to keep me focused. 

I massaged my brows in frustration. I usually could concentrate using sheer willpower. Perhaps my lack of sleep had caught up with me and demolished any vestigial dedication I had for this course.

But my thoughts wandered back to how warm and comforting dozing off in Leo's arms felt, how the scent of his sheets that smelled lightly of sandalwood and roses enveloped me in a dizzying trance-like state; his hands running through my hair and eventually settling at the small of my back and holding me close.