I am getting quite tired of those around me constantly telling me what to do or who to be or what they think the best option for me is.
There are many things I dont quite understand about this life yet and there are things that I promise you I simply never will.
I want to hold you until the world turns to fire and there is nobody left to remember the love story of you and I.
A story that simply happened by accident.
I never meant for you to fall down this rabbit hole with me and I will never be able to apologize enough times for dragging you into the calamity that is my mind.
The constant eb and flow of the waves that crash against my skull and scream hurricanes into the back of my soul digging and clawing and drowning any positivity it can find.
I am unhealthy.
I know that.
I know that I constantly treat myself like shit and beg for those around me to help pick me up when I untimely throw myself to the ground.
The ground calls me home so often that the thought of a casket for me is one of reality.
I wasn't supposed to make it this long.
I am unloved by myself and somehow this little piece of heaven named YOU stumbled upon me.
I hate you for that.
I wish I was dead.
You make the world vibrant and my problems seem like pebbles.
You make living so much easier.
and I hate you for that.
