Illegal Temptation

Chapter 23

"my mother died while giving birth to me. I never saw her. Shamita chachi says she was very pretty. Chachi took me in. The owner gulab bai was very sweet to me in the initial days. She let me go to school but she asked me to join dance classes too. I didn't understood what she said. But she told me that I had beauty and moves any men would throw millions for me. I was too innocent to understand that.

I was 5 when I joined dance classes. No one behaved nicely with me and I never understood why. But shamita chachi treated me like her own. She was the best friend of my mother.

I came into light when I was 15. That time I danced as the main dancer of the mehfil. I didn't liked the way they stared at me. I don't liked it Veer. They use to try touching me. I cried about it to gulab bai. And she told me I have to do it no matter what. That day I came to know about the debt I had to pay. My mother died early so I had to pay for her behalf as well as mine.

I liked dancing honestly. I learnt it with my whole heart. I even got certified for it. But i didn't liked dancing in front of men. So chachi put me under a veil." Ruhi started telling everything.

"Rooh. Let's go to bed, you will catch cold bub" he whispered softly taking her to bed and wrapping a blanket around them.

"I was 16 when I came to know about the ugly reality. It was then when I got to know why visitors gave me biscuits when I was in chachis room. Or why they asked me to leave. And chachi would cry everytime they left. Sometimes later I understood that even I have to do it.

So I ran away without caring anything but got caught by maaliks bodyguard. They dragged me back. and then for the first time she h--hit me. The bodyguards hit me till I was blue black. No body came to help me why would they. They didn't liked me anyway. Chachi was sick that day.

After that day the hits never stopped. Maalik would beat me every chance she got. She made sure to not ruin my face. That's what gave her money afterall. I completed my studies till highschool. I wanted to study more. I wanted to do literature but she didn't allowed me.

The most dreadful day came when I turned 18, I was legal for pro-prostitution. All the customers were waiting for me to be legal. That day the highest bidder purchased me. I was a virgin ofcourse. Maalik made sure the amount should be heavy.

But no money can replace the pa-ain I felt. I felt- I felt someone was tearing me apart. That man was all over me. I was disgusted by my own self. I can't ever forget his fil-lthy touches. My dig-gnity was ripped along with my clothes.

I couldn't bre-eathe properly, his body was so heavy. He even used my mouth..I-i felt my jaw was breaking.
Everything hurted Veer.. everything fucking thing hurted.

That day I understood why chachi used to cry when they left. I didn't cry, i-i wasn't concious when he left me. There was so much blood. The whole sh--sheet was covered with bl-lood.

I couldn't move for three days. My body ached even in the slightest movement. Chachi requested maalik to let me rest. She agreed.

This continued for a year or so. I used to dance in the evening and at night become a prostitute. A slu-t. A gold-digger. People were so disrespectful. They didn't even respected us as human being.

We were never acknowledged as a human being. Somedays things would go so violent. That a customer killed one of the worker and police didn't indulged themselves as this is an illegal work .

I used to get more customers and more money because of my beauty as maalik said. But i ha-ted it. I hated my face, there were days when I wouldn't see my own face because I hated it so much. I used to scr-atch all over my face to look ugly. Maalik found out and hit me again.

After a year I m-met a g-guy. He used to come to mehfil. But never came at night. One day he did..but not for se-x..he said he wanted to be friends and wanted to know me. I ignored him b-because no one ever wanted to be my friend why would he. I declined. It was weird for me. I felt more scared. But he was so stubborn. He purchased me everyday. And sit with me. I didn't talked for the whole week. He would sit and talk, thinking I was listening to him. After sometimes when he didn't gave up. I talked to him.

He came to know about my likings towards books. So whenever he came he bought books with him. After sometimes I agreed to be friends with him..chachi warned me alot. To stay away from him. But i didn't. He was my first friend. Everything was so sweet. I didn't had sex because he purchased me every night. I just danced in the evening.

Everything was good. He was very supportive and accepting. He saw me beyond my work. He took me out for the first time. It felt so unreal. I was genuinely happy. He used to talk about how he will marry me.

Being the son of a rich man. He did everything, I requested him not to spend so much money on me. But he still did saying we are friends.

I fell for him, for his nature, for his personality. During this whole time. He never did anything to make me uncomfortable..he never touched me inappropriately. I was in awe. It was like my dream came true.

From birth I have heard
"veshyo se mohab-bat nhi hoti"
"Hume kabhi koi apna nhi sakta"
"koi hamare karib nhi aa sakta, iss samaj ke liye ka-lank hai hum"
"Hum paiso ke liye jism bechte hai"
"Hamari koi iz-zat nhi"
"Hamara kabhi pariwar nhi ban sakta koi hume nhi apn-ayega"
"Koi humse sha-di nhi karega"  or bi bhut kuch.

Lekin mai- mai bhut khush thi, kyuki Maine sabko galat sabit kar diya tha. Vo hamare sath the, Hume apna chuke the, hamari izzat karte the.

(No one loves a prostitute.
No one can accept us.
No one can come near us, we were shame in the society.
We sell our body for money.
We don't have dignity, we don't have respect.
We can't make our family, no one can accept us.
No one will marry us.
And many more.

But I was very happy. because I had proved everyone wrong. He was with me, he accepted me, he respected me)

I was in cloud nine. We went on dates. He proposed me I accepted. That day he kissed me for the first time. Slowly after days things got further.. we had an intimacy. He was so caring and gentle about me.

I was so deeply in love with him. Forgetting the fact that love is not for someone like me.

Then one day. I felt si-sick

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