Enchanted

Chapter 15

Nicolette

Sunday (7/20)

Here's a story regarding yesterday which technically had nothing to do with me but I am bored right now. We usually have a family bonding time on Saturdays and just hang around the house binge-watching television shows but things were different yesterday. Mads told mum and dad she got a boyfriend in the morning and they were on cloud nine because she's a total nerd. (including me) Hahaha... In the afternoon, Mads brought him over to our house. I swear my jaw dropped to the floor when he walked through that door because never in my entire life would I think she's dating Cedric Orlando. The Cedric Orlando who is popular for being handsome as hell soccer player and genius in academics from my year. And apparently, they have been dating for almost a year now. His demeanour is self-effacing and very down-to-earth which is something I just realised. (Maybe not all popular kids are mean and boastful) I could tell mum and dad liked him as well, the way the conversation was riveting and full of jokes. Dad even asked him to join us for a run around the neighbourhood and he agreed. He is athletic and Mads was trying hard to keep up with him. When Mads was preparing dinner with mum in the kitchen, Cedric chatted with me for a while. I was shocked that he actually knows me (probably via Mads) since we don't talk in school, let alone sit 1 foot away from each other. Turns out, he knows how to play chess and Mads also gave him lessons. We played a match and he asked me questions about Mads like her favourite place in town. The way he asked the questions like he is very keen on knowing Mads told me he is in love with her very much. We had mashed potatoes with grilled chicken for dinner and he left not long after. A surprisingly exciting day!

Wednesday (7/23)

Mads came back from her part-time work at a coffee shop two streets away. She brought home a pack of ramen with fried tempura for me as lunch. She watched me eat (which is funny) while I interrogated her about Cedric and she didn't seem mad at all. Mads said Cedric's birthday is at the beginning of the year so he turned 14 and could work part-time with her this summer. If I'm not wrong, she mentioned Cedric's comfort food is ramen so they went to the Japanese restaurant beside for lunch after morning shift. I swear both of them are so good at keeping their relationship secretive because I don't think I see them walk together in school. Mads said they go separate ways in school because they don't want any drama. People with IQs of 120 just contemplate all aspects of life. The way Mads blushed while talking about Cedric just makes me want to feel how falling in love is. They are meant to be together and I'm super happy for Mads. She definitely deserves Cedric more than other nasty girls in school who look at Cedric with lustful eyes like he's a walking food that is delicious and waiting to be devoured.

I used to like Cedric Orlando, not as the school version of him but as Madeleine's boyfriend. Maybe if that accident did not occur, I would still consider him a good friend. He has the personality of being likeable by everyone, even waiters in restaurants and strangers in malls and parks would smile at him as he greets them when he walked past. He makes everyone's day better just like Madeleine.

I wondered what Madeleine would think about Cedric now that her place is soon to be replaced by Sabrina. Will she think she will play a better girlfriend than Sabrina or Sabrina deserves Cedric more than her? Madeleine doesn't like to pick fights with people so she might give up her place for Sabrina.

"Madeleine, you're such a precious girl but you're too gentle and kind which might get you into trouble," mum once said during our afternoon tea time after watching an American high school drama about a nerd, Darcy being picked by the mean popular trio who rules the school. One of the posh mean girls, Amelia tried to sabotage Darcy's scholarship into one of the world's most prestigious universities that she applied for. Darcy didn't get the scholarship so she studied at a community college while working at a local restaurant to pay her fees. Instead, Amelia got a spot at the university thanks to her dad's high status and wide social network. She didn't cope well with her mental health due to the competition in grades and sports and she failed miserably. The ending was pretty cliche. After Darcy graduated from university and went through multiple hardships, she built a company of her own. Amelia's father's business was not doing well and they declared bankruptcy. Amelia realised she could not complete her degree and had to find a job. Somehow, Darcy hired her to be the company's graphic designer. There was a romance subplot in the movie as well but that was not the main point mum was referring to.

"I think both of you should take up karate or taekwondo. It's more useful than pepper spray," dad added after sipping his hot black coffee. "Mum, dad, I'm not being bullied okay?" Madeleine said. "Really? Because you just let Nicole steal your cupcake," mum switched the topic after realising I was not paying attention to anything she said and gave me a look while I licked the vanilla cream on top of the cupcake I stole from Madeleine's plate. "I just don't have the appetite to eat and if cupcakes make Nicole happy, then she can have my share," Madeleine defended me. "And who in their right mind would hit their own sister when their sister is so cute?" Madeleine then faced me and scrunched her nose.

She was just 12 years old at that time and she was already an angel in the eyes of everyone. I would not blame my parents if someday they told me they like Madeleine more than me and that the person who passed away should be me and not her.

I have always loved how her presence haloed in the midst of my life and brought me back on track when I strayed into the wilderness. I started emulating her when I entered high school- dress like her, talk like her and smile like her. I even took chemistry classes because I knew I could seek her guidance when I am lost. As time passed, I thought I have already changed into a brand new person, a girl who follows her sister's footsteps to success. I can be teachers' favourite student, be part of one of the school's girl squads and get a boyfriend of my own.

But life is not a bed of roses.

When Madeleine left Earth and returned to heaven that day, I lost it all. I lost it all because I was her. I was her twin that imitated her actions over the past years until I forgot my own identity as Nicolette Evergreen.

The world crumbled down and suppressed me under the crushed pieces of concrete of tall skyscrapers. Before the debris in the air could dissipate and allow a ray of sunshine to hit the ground, the second wave of earthquake occurred. Not on land but in the ocean beds. The seawater drew back and uncovered the sediment sands and mud, the wavelength compressed and heightened up to 10 metres before the giant wave raced to the shoreline and demolished everything in its way. I couldn't see anything but my ears could hear the water cascading down. The wave was so aggressive it lifted the heavy concrete off me and the cold water hit my skin and the saltwater burned the wounds all over my body. I can swim but my arms and legs were too numb to fight for my life. I opened my mouth but my voice was muffled as water flooded my air passage. I gave up but my heart continued to beat. By some miracle, I survived the terror of my own world and was washed ashore on a foreign island.

The entire summer, I had to pull myself together like missing puzzle pieces before the new school year starts. I assembled old Nicolette and the imitation of Madeleine. I always told myself it will work out because I moved to a new town and nobody knew me. I believed in this lie for a complete 3 years and I was so comfortable living in it.

Until now.

I figured out I was just wearing Madeleine on the outside all along. She was a skin to cover my flaws flowing in my blood and transmitting between the impulses in my nervous system. I am still old Nicolette.

I did not dare to think further. I do not want to think about it any longer.

Madeleine and I might only have two years difference in age but I felt like I never know her personally. We never had a tête-à-tête before. 7 years ago, I was still a kid but she already entered her teenage year. 5 years ago, I started puberty but she was already busy with assignments and extra curriculum. 4 years ago, it was already too late. She had a boyfriend to share her secrets and her feelings with.

I wondered did Madeleine think the same way. Did she include me in her life or cut me out of her picture? I would read her diary if I have it in my hands but my parents decided to put it in her coffin together with her precious items.

Madeleine, speak to me through my dreams. Please tell me what would you do if this is your life.