FERRY-LOVE-BOAT

Chapter 38

Carina's POV:

When I looked at Maya, I saw in her one of the strongest people I knew and although her physical strength was cause for sighs, her emotional strength was inspiring and made me want her even more. I never liked people who were superficial and wanted to look perfect all the time, and when Maya started to open up to me - little by little - I was even happier to realize that there was a real person attached to that magnificent body.

It wasn't easy to think that for our relationship to work, we would both have to give up a little control; I enjoyed receiving pleasure as much as the next person, but when I stopped to think about it after the night I almost had sex with Maya, I realized that even when I have someone between my legs, making me moan, I try to exert some control over the situation and that wasn't what Maya wanted.

She wanted me surrendered.

I wanted her the same way, and I was more than happy when we talked at the station a few days ago during the snowstorm and she told me that she would be willing to compromise if I was too. It was the logical thing to do. It was the right thing to do. I would do it for her, even if it meant completely bursting the bubble of my comfort zone.

Now I was circulating in the kitchen as I picked tomatoes to make a homemade tomato sauce - my grandmother's special recipe - to make the lasagna I was preparing even more special. Cooking was therapeutic for me; I did things automatically while allowing my mind to free itself and my anxiety to dissipate with each cut of the knife.

After a few minutes the doorbell rang, and I had to turn down the fire cooking the tomatoes to check who was on the other side of my door.

-Andrea! -I smiled when I saw my brother. - What are you doing here?

-Not the kind of welcome I was expecting. - He laughed as I allowed him to enter the house. He was slightly wet from the light drizzle that was falling that afternoon. - It seems like ages since I've seen you!

-Don't exaggerate! - I rolled my eyes and let out a laugh. - You're a resident, you're the one who doesn't have time to come visit me, and you're always busy at the hospital following Meredith Grey's trail.

-Why do you pick on her so much?

-I'm not picking on her! I'm picking on you! - I slapped him lightly on the back of the head before brushing past him and heading for the kitchen.

-It's about time I started picking on you, too. - I went back to stirring the saucepan, but turned my head in his direction, raising one eyebrow in silent questioning. - Perhaps about your impending change of profession.

-What? - I asked back. - I'm not changing professions.

-Given how much time you spend inside Station 19, I thought you were considering quitting medicine and becoming a firefighter. - He laughed at my face and my cheeks burned.

-I don't spend much time there! I volunteered once and the other day I went there to do a favor for Travis, who wanted some tips on how to deliver a baby in case they couldn't get to the hospital in time. - I tried to defend myself, but the words came out fast and a bit slurred due to my nervousness.

-So, you went there strictly for professional purposes? - He asked.

-Yes. - I lied.

-So, you didn't see Maya there? - He asked again.

-She works there, Andrea! Of course I'll see her there.

-Okay, so you didn't kiss Maya either of the two times you were there for, you know, strictly professional purposes! - He squinted his eyes in defiance, he was expecting a confession, one that I didn't want to give and considered lying about, but as soon as I felt my face getting hotter and hotter I knew that my blushing was answer enough for his questioning.

Yes, there had been a kiss or two while I had visited her at the station for the second time, but it had been nothing too intense, just a tender rubbing of our lips, far from the passion behind our first kiss, or the night of our first date-and knowing how delicious her heated kisses were didn't help my self-control, there was always a little voice in my head urging me forward, but I was determined to take it slow.

-That's not relevant. - I tried to run away from the subject.

-You're falling for Maya! Just say it! - He laughed and leaned against the kitchen doorframe, crossing his arms against his chest.

-Andrea! -I groaned before moving the pan to the sink, next to the serving dish on which I would put the lasagna.

-What? Just admit it!

-There's nothing to admit. - I was tired of being the center of the subject of that conversation. - She is an interesting woman, and we are just getting to know each other, that's all.

-Carina, you don't get into the "getting to know each other" stage with anyone! That is huge! - He spoke behind me, and I couldn't tell if he was making fun of me or if he was really serious, and I didn't turn toward him to check. - Anyway! I came to tell you that I'm going away for the weekend, Nico and the other residents have asked me to go camping.

-It's freezing outside! - I quickly turned my head in his direction, interrupting my cooking process. - You'll lose a toe camping in this cold.

-Carina, I'm used to the weather in Seattle. It's you who needs to see the cold as your new normal. - I couldn't help the frown that formed on my face. - Although now you have a hot firefighter to warm you up, so I guess you won't be complaining so much about the cold from now on.

-Andrea! -I squealed as I was taken aback by his bold words, my brother hated it when I talked about anything that had to do with sex, I hardly recognized him after that sentence.

-I'm leaving! I'm leaving! - He raised both hands in front of his body in surrender while still laughing softly. - I'll see you Monday.

-Take care, and take blankets and warm clothes, and remember to close the tent before you sleep, and build a fire, and...

-Carina! Breathe, we'll be fine! If you don't hear from me in the next two days, it's because of the bad reception in the place. - He came over to me and gave me a warm but quick hug and kissed my temple before heading back toward the door. - And Carina?

-Yes? -I raised my eyes to his.

-I like her, you two are a good match. - He smiled sideways and, though embarrassed, I smiled too.

-Thank you.