I couldn't really process brunch. My mind was only blank- trying to explain to even myself what had happened. I plopped down on my bed, belly up. Picturing Aonung sitting next to me. Reliving how close he felt, how electricity sparked across my body at ever small touch we made, how from under the table he placed his hand on my leg and looked to me for permission. The eye contact we held as his thumb slowly rubbed against my inner thigh. I swear I could feel his touch lingering. This moment wouldn't leave my thoughts- it fact it was only thing I thought about. Burrowing it's way deeper and deeper, trying to create its own little compartment. All I wanted to do was talk to him. It was no secret that I'm gay, being so openly out about it. But Ao- he just didn't seem like the type.
I grew tired at this point, but couldn't sleep even if I wanted to. Leaning my body over, I reached under my pillow pulling out my phone. I clicked the power button with my index finger, the time read 12:45 p.m. The thought of confiding in Kiri came to mind.
Sis🌿:
Neteyam- "Hey can u come to my room ?"
Kiri- "omw"
The door slowly opened as Kiri made her way to me. She seemed just as lost as I felt. Her shoulders curled around, sinking her center in. She cautiously made her way to the floor, once next to me she pulled her arms around herself- in a full body hug.
(SIDE NOTE: Their whole convo is in Arabic but I was not about to translate ALL of this. )
"Whats wrong Kiri ?" I paced one arm behind me for support and the other on Kiri's back. Slowly messaging up and down, side to side- as an attempt to comfort her.
Hesitation filled her words as she softly spoke, "Brunch was shitty." Her gaze couldn't even meet mine- but I knew exactly what she meant.
"Yeah it kinda was..."
"What happened to you brother ?" Finally we locked eyes, but I noticed how glossy hers seemed. Even with only the phone light I could tell she had recently finished crying.
"Aonung did somethin weird..." This time I was the one to break apart and turned towards my pillow. Burring one side of my face as much as possible.
"Oh- really ?"
"Yeah, during brunch... we... well... we... had a m-moment. Kinda... ish." Her hand started to circle, signaling for me to continue.
"So we were sitting next to each other- right ? And it was a little awkward but it was whatever but then- then. He put his hand on my thigh, and I wanted him to but..." I had to stop myself, even I didn't know where I was going at this point.
Kiri's face was speechless, one could see the wheels in her brain turning. Trying to keep up with the new information being jammed in it.
" Do you like him ?"
"I don't know- I don't even know him so no. I don't... I just find him attractive..."
"Well; a 6' foot somethin, clear blue eyes, long curly hair, spiral tattooed guy, with bulging muscles is gunna be attractive..." Kiri made a good point, he was physically attractive- of course he was. But, that doesn't mean I want him.
"I get what your saying Kiri, it was just weird at brunch."
"Oh I know."
"Well... what happened with you ?"
My sister rolled her back flat into the floor. Arms spread into a 't' position. I could see her lips quickly moving as she made up a conversation in her mind. She was trying to figure out a way to talk to me- even though I was right there.
"Kiri ???" I placed my hand on her knee slowly shaking her back to reality.
"Hhhhh" She quickly sighed while sitting back up again. This time her legs were crossed as her back was hunched over once again.
"I snapped at Rotxo and now feel like shit and I don't know what to do and I can't stop thinking about it..." As Kiri was rambling I could see she was starting to panic. Her breathing was heavy and couldn't really think straight.
"Hey, hey it's okay. I'm sure you two will work it out ! It's Rotxo, he doesn't seem like the one to hold a grudge !" My tone had changed from pitty to genuine. But it was obvious that my words meant nothing to her. That they were only that- words.
"Hahahaha" A large fit of laughter could be heard echoing through the halls.
"What was that ?" I looked towards Kiri, puzzled by the sound that was just heard.
"Lo'ak is FaceTiming with Tsireya."
"Oh, well at least he's fine-" I knew my words might have sounded sarcastic but I was truly happy that Lo'ak wasn't obsessing over one of are new 'friends'. If they even thought of us as such.
"Tsireya said she would talk to Rotxo but I haven't heard from ether of them since. So, I don't know what's gunna happen..."
"At least someone is talking to him for you. My problem is ALL on me."
"Maybe you have no problem. For me I know that Rotxo is hurt- but how do you know that this is even fazing Aonung. Maybe he does this with a lot of people- I mean he looks like a player. Even if he's not trying to get with you, this might just be how he acts." Kiri's words stung deep in my core. The feeling of hurt hit my heart- only leaving an empty feeling. Though I knew I only felt this way because more than likely my sister was right. It was just the thing I needed to hear- even if I didn't wanna hear it.
"Dame that's cold. But true, very true."
"I'm sorry brother."
"Nah I needed to hear it. And better coming from you then him..."
Almost mechanically my sister walked out, only to be waltzing back in five seconds later with her body pillow, purple blanket, and 'Grace' (Her ginger siamese cat). Once settled into bed I whispered 'goodnight' towards my sister. She tiredly let out a 'night'- as if all her life span was being drained out with every breath. Grace purred against my stomach, also setting in for the night. Using only my pointer finger I grazed the top of Grace's head. Letting her know I was saying to goodnight to her as well.
Grace⬇️:
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
