So Keep In Happiness And Torture Me

I Don't Need Any More Friends

"I'm buzzing for this!" Jack exclaimed.  We'd just pulled up outside the studio and were about to get out.  I refrained myself from making one of the sarcastic, cynical remarks that were lurking in the forefront of my eyes and instead murmured a quick "mm-hmm."  He place his hand on my thigh and squeezed it gently.  I tried not to flinch.

"Alex!  Kellin!" shouted a familiar voice from across the road, and an equally familiar figure came into view to flash us both a huge, cheeky smile.  It was Alex Gaskarth, dressed in the customary black skinny jeans and glamour kills t-shirt.  He embraced us both in turn.

"Nice to see you," I said to him.

"Nice to see you're still stealing my man from me," he winked playfully.  I wanted to tell him that he could take Jack now for all I cared, take him and run with the wind.

"You're still upset about that? Aw man," joked Jack, playing along.  They both pretended to break down into sobs and fixed each other in another hug.  Sometimes I swore they were better suited for each other than we were, and that even they knew that.

"Woah, did I come at the wrong moment?" laughed Jesse.  I was relieved to see the friendly smile; Jesse never took anything seriously but he also never failed to stop an awkward conversation being, well, awkward.

"I don't even know what's happening anymore, let's leave my boyfriend and his lover to it," I laughed.

"My plan worked!" shouted Alex triumphantly, but soon walked off to join Zack and Rian, who I noticed were stood by the door to the studio.  Much to my disdain Jack was by my side and grabbing my hand before I could even attempt to begin a decent conversation with Jesse.  The three of us walked in silence into the studio, where Jack, Gabe and Justin were already sat.  We greeted the trio and we sat down to join them until the others came inside.

"What have you guys even been doing?" Jack asked when his band mates finally came in at half past twelve.

"That's for us to know and you to wonder," winked Rian. I looked to Jack to monitor his reaction, and I swear there was a look of panic in his eyes that seemed a strange reaction to something that was a joke and shouldn't have bothered him even if it wasn't.

"Moving swifty on, let's get started on some ideas guys!" suggested Justin, grinning.  Jack picked up his guitar from beside him and began to strum a few chords.  

A few hours later we hadn't really got anything groundbreaking written so I suggested we all go off on a break.

"Me and Alex are heading off to Taco Bell if you want to tag along?" offered Jack.  I was surprised he was actually giving me a choice rather than pressuming I'd be tagging along.

"Actually I wanted a bit of time alone to think over some ideas if that's okay?"  I wasn't sure how he'd take that one, but it was worth a go.  

"Oh, that's okay.  See you later then,"  He didn't even turn back as him and Alex scooted off, deep in conversation.

"A bit of time alone to think these over?"  Justin asked me sceptically.

"I feel on Jack overload lately," I tried to pass it off as a joke.

"So do you actually want to eat alone or do you want to ome along with us?"

"I'll come along with you.  But let's not go to Taco Bell!"  Me, Justin and Jesse headed off into some cosy little cafe I'd never been to before.

"Are you planning on actually talking to us anytime soon then?"  Jesse asked, amused.

"About what?"

"Oh, I don't know, maybe the fact that there is something so wrong with you and Jack at the moment."

"You think?"

"I can't work out if you're being sarcastic or not."

"Hmm, I just wondered what your take on the whole thing was."

"Well I just get the feeling you don't want to be around him like you used to, and he seems to prefer Alex's company."

I'd been hearing what I'd expected to up to the mention of that name.

"Alex?  You really think so?"

"You hadn't noticed?" Justin asked, seeming just as surprised as Jesse; "I thought that was what you were so annoyed about."

"No.  I was annoyed at him before that."

Jesse and Justin rolled their eyes at each other.  "You were annoyed first," Jesse mocked me light-heartedly.

"Fuck off you two.  But seriously, that's just the way those two have always been, nothing new."

"They've always been close sure.  But Jack used to be all over you all the time, whereas now it''s only when Alex isn't there, in which case his attention is seriously diverted."  Justin pointed out.  I thought it through and although my mind wanted to dismiss it, I realised there was definitely an element of truth in that.  Jack was as clingy as ever most of the time, but he had been meeting Alex lots lately and if I went along too they did seem more interested in what each other had to say than me.

"Are you okay?"  Jesse asked awkwardly.

""Fucking brilliant thanks for asking"

"Kellin.."

"Just leave it guys okay, I really do want some peace to write now."  I wasn't even mad at them really but I just walked off.