Dear Future Me

Friday, October 11

Dear Diary,

To begin with Today I was in the girls bathroom

And made a complete fool of myself in front of my crush again, I can't help but face palm

And if that wasn't bad enough, I'm still stuck with a locker next to Mackenzie Hollister's!

Even though I tried to quest a change multiple times but "Apparently" there no locker available or the fact they don't want to go through the effort of looking for one.

She is the most popular girl at Westchester County Day Middle School and a total spoiled rich kid calling her a "bitch" is an understatement

She a Killer Shark in Sparkly nail polish, designer bags and platinum heels!

But for some reason, everyone "Worship" her

Making my eyes roll...

Mackenzie and I do Not get along, I'm guessing it's probably due to the fact that she

HATES MY GUTS!

She is forever gossiping behind my back and saying false rumors that I'm a skank or two timer even though I never been in a relationship! and she only known me for a year! So how would she know about my personal life?!

Even the guys drool all over her asking for her number

I do Not appreciate her blabbing about my personal business

Even guys calling me in the hallways teasing and making fun of me like it's a practical joke that

"I Don't GET!"

This morning she was even more vicious than usual

"Oh Nikki!! Could you please go write in that diary somewhere else?! Your starting to smell! Did you even take a shower this morning. It so gross that you don't even care about hygiene? That cat sweater is also clashing with my outfit?!"

Making me lose my smile and ruining my mood, I feel like it's her duty at this point to make me feel horrible

I wasn't even bothering her just keeping to myself.....

Still bewildered and taken back

I knew the reason why she thinks I smell or there bugs in my hair because my father a big exterminator?!

Before I could say a comeback she walked away with Saloni and Pearl acting all innocent

She even trash talked and belittle my family in the past, I didn't even do anything to her?!

So I don't understand her behavior or reasoning... I'm utterly clueless still being left in the dark

And if all of that isn't enough TORTURE, the annual WCD Halloween dance is in three weeks!

It's the biggest event of the fall, and everyone is already gossiping who's going with who

Above all Mackenzie and Brandon going together seems already set in stone

Yesterday when he asked ME to be his lab partner for biology class!

I thought I misheard I was stunned
I swear my mouth was wide open for everyone to see!

And today I had a sneaking suspicion Brandon was to pop the question about the Halloween dance

When I heard him talking to his friends earlier

It wasn't because I was STALKING!

I just happened to walk past him after class in the hallways

I SWEAR!?

The day seemed to drag on FOREVER.....

By the time I got to biology class I was practically dragging my feet

Suddenly a very troubling question popped into my head and I started to worry

The only thought I had was he only saw me as another classmate: nothing special

That's when I decided to try to impress him with my charm and intelligence

Scratch Wit...

I gave him a smile and I fixed my posture as I tried to look calm

TOTALLY not starring

Is it obvious?......

Out of the corner of my eye, I could see Brandon staring at me with this urgent yet very perplexed look on his face

Did he catch me starring

As Sweat starts to go down my back

I couldn't tell if I was imagining it but he seemed like he wanted to talk but didn't want to get in trouble

As I tried to stay calm I try to keep my posture, he finally walked over as I turn around to face him

"Can I ask you something really important Nikki?" He asked almost looking embarrassed

"What is it?" Trying to Look innocent and clueless

Taking out my wireless earbud I had in, normally the teacher only allowed one so we could still hear him if necessary

"Do I need to plug this in?..." Brandon smiles awkwardly

As I looked at the plug he holding in his hand, Suddenly noticing it

Did I hear wrong.....

I kept blinking wondering if I was imagining it

"Um... yes?" I say hesitantly

I looked around still not coming to terms with it

I thought Brandon was smart?....

Was he not?

Still being dumbfounded

Those things in the microscope really were just lint......

I knew right then and there I couldn't even look at Brandon again out of shame and embarrassment

Then back to the girl's bathroom like I said earlier

when I overheard Mackenzie bragging to her friends that she had Brandon wrapped around her finger I couldn't believe my ears

The audacity she thinks she has controlling someone like her boy toy?!

I wanted to slap her in her face right then and there

I knew that she was a terrible person but I thought she least had some interest in him

As a decent human being but can we even call her HUMAN?

I was so frustrated and angry with my eyebrows squinting

I waited until the bathroom was empty to curse her out loud before leaving

My parents always said the most important thing to remember is this:

Always remain calm and try to handle your personal problems in a private and mature manner

But to hell with what my parents say, what do they know?!

Can they even remember their middle school years or the countless mistakes they made

God how annoying
As I curse in the air

Even if I tried to talk with Mackenzie respectfully it never worked with her calling me a tramp?!