The Swords We Yield - ◈ ARMIN ARLERT X OC ◈

Chapter 4 - Forgiveness

"What the hell where you three thinking!" Adam yells at us, leaning on the shelf about the fire in front of us. Running his fingers through his hair, he begins pacing up and down the length of the room.

"You!" He mutters pointing at Jacob, "Climbing an unstable pole to yell at people double your age about something that wasn't your responsibility!" He clenches his fists and his side shaking his head. I stare down at my feet, too embarrassed to look Adam in the eyes. I was doing so well, I had shown Adam I was a responsible, hard working recruit doing my part, he had even introduced me to Hange.

"And you, Zariya?" He says again gesturing to me, I quickly look up to meet his gaze. "What the hell were you thinking? Headbudding a commrade and punching a full grown man! Are you lot out of your mind?" He exclaims throwing his hands in the air. He scoffs under his breath walking over to the desk, I look over my shoulder to see him grab something out of the top draw. This must be his office, I quickly look back in front of me at my feet as he closes the drawer.

"Here." He states putting his hand out in front of me, I look up to see a bandage and cloth resting in his palm. I look up at him again without moving.

"Well, take it!" He says again. I open my mouth to speak but the words get stuck in my throat, "For goodness sake." He mumbles, taking my wrist and putting the objects in my hand. I go to say thank you but he quickly turns away walking back to the fireplace.

He rests his arm on the shelf, stabbing the charcoal with the sword in his other hand. I look over to Gen who silently stares back at me, she shrugs her shoulders before turning back to Adam. I look back at him as well, but what I see throws me off, he is shivering? Laughing? Why is he laughing? Soon his muffled laughter turns into outright mockery, holding his stomach he wipes a tear away from his eyes. Jacob, Gen and I all share extremely confused looks, as Adam attempts to control himself. He takes in a deep breath waving us off, "Sorry" He squeals, laughing again. He quickly clears his throat before speaking in his normal tone. "Sorry." He says sternly.

"What the hell just happened?" Jacob asks, utterly confused. He sits up from his relaxed position resting his elbows on his knees. "One minute you look like you were about to kill us, and the next you are laughing your head off like a kid who just saw a bubble for the first time?" He questions further gesturing to Adam. He looks back at Jacob with a blank look on his face, "Well?" Jacob continues.

"Oh! You want me to explain. Right." Adam says, finally catching on. He returns the poker back to its holder and grabs his desk chair before sitting down in front of us.

"The last time I saw anyone do something as stupid as what you three did back there was when I was a recruit." He begins, shaking his head with a smirk on his face. "At the time Moblit and I had joined the scouts and we had just met Hange. I remember being about your age when Levi Ackerman had been recruited with his two buddies from the underground city." He continues. Next to me, I see Jacob tense his muscles and go completely still, I look up at him but he avoids my gaze looking directly at Adam. I study his face, watching him as his jaw twitches and his breaths become very short and uneven.

"What are you staring at?" He finally snaps, glaring back at me, making me jump in my seat.

"Nothing, sorry." I mutter, looking back at Adam who clears his throat before continuing.

"Right." Adam mumbles, "As I was saying, Levi had just joined and I remember the tantrum Hange threw, because we had just spent the last 4 years of our lives training and he joined with nothing more than a shrug from our commander. She tried to frame him for stealing gear and tried to drag us into it, but of course back then she had no idea what she was doing." He smiles, reminiscing.

"That was the last time I had seen anyone so passionately try to speak up about what is right, nowadays," He trails off scratching the back of his head, "everyone is too scared to step on each other's toes. What you three did back there, as wrong as it was, reminded me of that. I have to say it was very refreshing, of course you will be punished, that is unavoidable. However, I do not want you to view the punishment as us trying to repress your passion but a lesson to think before you call your superiors 'scum'," He scoffs looking at Jacob. "Or hit a fully grown man," He looks at me shaking his head. "Of course this punishment will have to wait till after we deal with... well you know." He trails off. He lets out a long breath standing up. "We will be leaving tonight, it's the safest time to leave as the titan will be inactive." He tells us walking to the door, he grabs the door handle opening it. He goes to leave but stops in his tracks, "Until then, you three stay out of trouble." He smiles before leaving the room.

I catch myself smiling at the door once he has left. I quickly snap out of it, expecting further instructions from Moblit but he is nowhere to be seen, he must have slipped out while Adam was talking.

"Now what?" Jacob mutters, resting his head on his arm daydreaming out the window.

"Now we talk." I state sternly, Jacob snaps his head to look at me with a confused expression on his face.

"Talk about what exactly?" He questions, almost offended. I look over to Gen who is staring at Jacob as well.

"Talk about whatever the hell is going on with you." I push, nudging him with my shoulder, he looks at me before quickly standing up.

"Nothings going on." He mumbles, making his way to the door.

"Jacob, stop! You can't just storm off every time something goes wrong. We are the closest thing each other are going to get to family! We have to stick together otherwise we will have no one, we need to be honest!" Gen exclaims jumping to her feet. Jacob just scoffs reaching for the door, "That's really interesting, coming from you." He spits looking over his shoulder.

"What are you talking about Jacob!" she yells back at him, I quickly get up standing next to her.

"I'm talking about your whole 'family' bullshit." He grunts back, swinging the door open.

"Hey!" I shout at him, making him stop in his tracks. "This isn't what we do! We don't just walk out on each other when shit gets real, we need to stick by each other, even if we are arguing." I explain grabbing him by the wrist before he can leave. He refuses to look at me, staring out the door.

"You haven't forgiven me." He whispers under his breath.

"What?" Gen exclaims from behind me. Jacob pulls his wrist free of my arm.

"You guys haven't forgiven me!" He yells looking back at us. "Trust me-" He begins with a wobbly voice. "Trust me, I know what I did was wrong, going against Rosette like that. But you guys haven't forgiven me! At first I just brushed it off because I wanted to give you guys time, but-" He cries, "it's been days since you guys have even looked at me without disappointment in your eyes. I- how much longer are you guys going to punish me for what I did?" He trails off with unsteady breaths looking down at the ground. My heart breaks for him, partly because I hate seeing him so hurt but mostly because I know he's right. It's true, I haven't fully forgiven him, but seeing him like this hurts more than the anger I still have lingering towards him.

"Jacob." I whisper, concernedly. Beside me Gen rushes to his side wrapping her arms around him in a tight hug, she rests her head on his shoulder and he quickly hugs her back almost swallowing her with his embrace.
"We forgive you Jacob, you know that." Gen whispers unsteadily.

"Did you though?" He croaks out, shaking his head into her neck. I quickly walk over to them patting Jacob on the shoulder. I know him too well to know this isn't the thing that's going on, there is something else. But right now all Jacob needs is to have his best friends back, and that's something I can help him get.