Mental Illness Poems

Spiraling

i don't to like to read

but i read a book today

a book about little families with little happy stories about love

it made me upset

I wish i had that little family with a happy little story

I wish i saw the world like that little girl did in her little book

I wish i saw the world differently

when you get older you realize how screwed everything is

how messed up it was how bad it could have been

I don't like to compare

because dosent the thing feel bad when you say it is less than the other

don't you feel guilty? don't you feel bad?

i feel pretty bad

i've been sick lately but not just that i feel

so many upcoming events on my shoulders breaking and breaking

have you ever broke something?

like the other day i broke the lid of my drink

and it made me feel so bad i just wanted to cry

i want to cry

but i cant because i don't want to feel bad

i want to be happy i want to leave it all behind

i like to be behind

i'm not a great leader 

and when i fall i will have someone else to blame

I used to get blamed

i remember getting blamed in school because i remember

what it was like to talk trash about those close to you

that was a while ago

it was a long time ago in a place i kind of miss

a place that was so bliss a place of school and learning of

I don't like school anymore

i don't feel safe and when i do i don't find

myself to even be happy

assignments keep me pretty busy

i don't like them because they make me anxious 

they need to be done but i don't want to do it

I don't want to do certain things

Just how i don't like to read