The Sweetest Thing (gxg)

Part 8

At around this time last year- I knew I needed to confirm how I was feeling.

I knew I had this...fascination toward girls. Being with them. Kissing them. Maybe even more.

I needed to confirm my feelings were true.

I considered making a Tinder account, even at age 17. But I thought that involved too much. And I was too worried my parents would find out. I am on my dads phone plan- and I knew it was virtually impossible, but I couldn't help the paranoia.

So I decided to approach the one girl in school that had been out and proud since I could remember-

Lauren Cole.

I remembered being in 9th grade, and seeing Lauren get bullied for her sexuality. She was a very masculine presenting lesbian, and it was obvious that she was one.

When I would see her get bullied, my heart hurt.

Because deep down, I knew that could be me.

It wasn't people I knew that bullied her, but I wish I could have done something. I was terrified though.

Lauren was always herself though, no matter what. And by the time junior year rolled around, the bullying lessened and lessened.

Lauren refused to wear the uniform skirt- she always wore the pants. Her hair was short and spiky, and always dyed fun colors.

I didn't know what else to do besides approach her. I would often see her in the art room after school. The whole day when I was planning on approaching her, I couldn't eat, I was so nervous. I had only ever had one class with Lauren, pottery. She knew who I was though.

Almost everyone at the school did.

I walked into the art room after school that day- and thankfully- Lauren was there alone.

What are the chances?

She was painting, and it was a beautiful abstract piece. She was wearing headphones, and when she saw me walking up to her, she put them around her neck.

She looked a bit confused when she saw me walking over to her, but curious as well.

I walked up to her, and came right out with it. The second before I spoke, I realized how ridiculous I might sound- but I said it.

"I need a favor from you. Only if you want." I said.

"And what would that be, Charlotte?" she asked me.

I lowered my voice, even though no one was around, "I think I'm gay. I...was wondering if you could help me."

Lauren's eyebrows raised, "Oh. And...how exactly can I help you?"

"I don't know. Maybe by talking to me about it. Helping me...figure it out." I said, not wanting to come out with it fully.

"You mean by hooking up with you?" Lauren asked me.

"Oh god, I sound so fucking stupid." I said, "I'm just so confused, I-"

"Charlotte. Calm down. I'll help you." Lauren said, "I'll never say no to hooking up with a pretty girl."

I felt a blush creep onto my face, "Oh...okay. Thank you."

"How about I give you my number, and you text me when you're ready for the 'help'?" Lauren suggested.

"Okay." I said, "That sounds good...oh, and don't tell anyone about this. Please. You can't."

"Charlotte, once again, calm down. I would never out someone. Only terrible people do that. I'm not terrible." Lauren reassured me.