Undying Tension

Part 8 - Avoiding The Truth

"Atsushi... are you okay?"

My mind went blank. Am i okay? "Me? Yeahh why wouldn't i be!"  I insisted. "I mean... after lwhat happened last night-" akutagawa couldn't finish the sentence as i interrupted him by yelling some nonsense. "I was drunk last night. It's not a biggie" i stated and quickly ran downstairs leaving akutagawa abashed.

Take deep breath atsushi. In and out.

I tried to calm myself down as I quickly emptied another glass of water. I pulled out my cellphone. Maybe it'd be better to give Dazai a call.

Dazai's POV :

My phone was ringing. I slowly lifted chuuya's arm and crawled out of the bed. I picked up my phone and saw Atsushi's name on it. I know exactly why he's calling.

The second I picked up the call i could hear him panicking over the phone. "Dazai you don't understand! I can't live with him anymore." He whined. "Quit complaining Atsushi, it can't be that bad" I laughed. "No Dazai-San... something REALLY embarrassing happened last night"

Oh I remember everything. "I know Atsushi. I called Akutagawa while you were... in the middle of something" I couldn't stop laughing as i was imagining Atsushi's face. "Shit. Stop laughing i need some support!" Atsushi cried out.

"I'll be there in 15 minutes" and I hung up.

Later

Atsushi's POV :

I could finally hear the door opening. "I'll ceck on Akutagawa so you two can speak alone" Chuuya said as he went upstairs. "So what seems to be the problem?" Dazai asked. "Well.. yk since that happened I haven't been able to speak with him properly" I explained. "You sound like Chuuya" Dazai laughed. "Keep you complicated relationships out of this please?" I said sarcastically. "I'm doing better than you are" Dazai replied jokingly.

I sighed and started to explain everything that happened last night.

"I don't see a problem with that? He wasn't drunk so that means whatever happened wasn't against his will?" Dazai tried to comfort me, but it didn't help. "It's not only that... it's just... embarrassing to talk to him after a messy night like that..." I mumbled. "I understand" Dazai said while patting my shoulder gently. I tried to calm down a little. "I think it would be better if you two just talked, alone." Dazai said. It's embarrassing to admit, but he was right. I took a few steps back before thanking him. "I'll do that..." i said before closing the door behind me.

Akutagawa's POV :

I was panicking, probably for the first time ever. "It's your fault, chuuya!" I yelled. "Wow... don't put the blame on me! He wanted to drink so I poured him in?" He explained. "Well you should've known better" I mumbled. Chuuya was just about to say something but he got a text measage. "It's dazai. We need to get going. I'm sure you two can handle this!" He tried to be supportive. "Chuuya you can't leave me like this-" i yelled as i saw him closing the door and running downstairs. "Well shit."

I heard a gentle knock on the door. "Come in..." i said, hesitating a little. Atsushi stepped in, locking the door behind him. I could tell he was just as nervous as i was. Instead of saying anything...

He hugged me.

I was confused, as I felt these tears of joy rolling down my cheeks. I was so overwhelmed it was hard to hide it. I gently pulled him closer, resting my head on his shoulder. "I'm so sorry... so sorry for avoiding you" atsushi said with tears filling his throat. "It's okay... I'm okay" i said quietly. This feels nice. I don't think i can ever forget this feeling, feeling of comfort filling my heart.

A while later atsushi took a few steps back, facing me. He gave me a slight smile. "I feel really bad about acting so awkward... it was new to me. I also felt guilty about... last night" he explained. I was shocked. "Why would you feel guilty about it...? It was my fault" i said with a nervous tone. "Well, I shouldn't have kissed you in the first place, at least not without a permission" he said. "Atsushi. You don't need a permission for that, not from me." I said, hiding my flushed face.

"What...?"

He was just as confused as i was. I had no idea how tell him this, but it was way too food of an opportunity to miss. "You know i like you, right?..." I asked. Atsushi was unsure of his answer. "Well... I didn't. Not before you told me" he admitted. Shit. "I guess I lack of conversational skills..." I chucked. Atsushi smiled and nodded. "I guess we both have the same issue" he giggled.