Desire - Jan Peteh

Neighbours

"How do you know my name?" is the only response I can think of.

"You're my neighbour, right? You introduced yourself to me when you moved in,"

"Oh. I'm sorry, I don't remember your name," he seems amused by this.

"Really?"

"Why? Is that so weird?" I raise one eyebrow.

"No, no, that's not what I meant. My name is Jan. Nice to meet you... again," he holds out his hand. I take a look at it and then look up at him. One eyebrow still raised.

"Or.. maybe not," he chuckles.

"I'd prefer you call me Lilah, or D. Whichever you like,"

"Okay, Lilah. Mind if I sit?" it doesn't look like Jan is going to give up, so I sigh and move aside.

It's silent for just a few seconds, until he starts to talk again.

"What are you doing here? Are you a fan?" he asks, slightly surprised.

I let out a big laugh, which I soon realise is very insulting. Especially since I've never even listened to their music.

"I'm sorry, I'm not here for the concert. I'm just waiting for my bus," I point up at the bus stop sign.

"Oh... right. Sorry," Jan's cheeks flush red.

"No, that's okay. I've never heard any of your songs, so who knows," he nods slowly and pulls a pack of cigarettes from his leather jacket. He gestures to me but I politely decline.

"I'm sorry, I just have to ask," he starts, while lighting up a cigarette. "Did I.. do something? Did I say something wrong?"

"What do you mean?" I ask, acting as if I don't know I'm being kind of a bitch to him.

"Well, I don't know. You're just kind of acting like.." he looks up at my face, now frowning.

"Like what? Maybe this is just my personality," I cross my arms. 

A small smile creeps up on his face. "Right... how lovely,"

I have to admit, he's making me kind of nervous. His smile, deep voice, use of sarcasm. God, keep it together Delilah.

"Well... maybe I'm just not used to someone playing guitar in the room next to mine until the middle of the night," the words just kind of flood out. I know, I said I didn't want to be a Karen. But he asked, okay?

His face quickly turns to mine. "What? That's what this is about? Why didn't you just come tell me it bothered you?" 

I scoff. "Yeah, I tried to but you didn't open up the door. As if you really would have done something about it anyway," 

I see my bus at the end of the street, coming towards me. I stand up. 

"I would have tried. I've just never gotten complaints before.. and this is kind of what I do," he points to the group of fans and the rest of the band behind him.

"I get it. It's fine," the bus stops next to me and the doors open.

"No, it's obviously not. Let's talk about this some other time," he suggests. I'm way to tired and moody to deal with this right now.

"It's fine. I'll see you later," I say, while I get inside the bus. When it starts to drive, I look back to see him walking towards the people that are left at the venue. He looks back at the bus once, but I look away immediately.

After a quiet 15 minute bus ride I arrive back home. My appartement is just around the corner from a bus stop, which is ideal. I'll need it for university, my classes start in 3 weeks and I'm pretty nervous.

Moving from Canada to Slovenia is a pretty big change. 

When I was 14, me and my parents and my brother, Theo, went to Europe for the first time. Before that, I had never even left Canada. It's not that we're poor - quite the opposite. But we just had our traditions. Every summer me and Theo would go to summer camp, and when we were too old to go we would work there. 

Every winter we went skiing. We always rented the same appartement, set up a Christmas tree, unwrapped gifts, and watched the fireworks at New Years.

But then in the summer of 2016, my parents decided they wanted something different. We took a month long road trip through Switzerland, Italy, Austria, Slovenia and we ended our trip in Croatia. 

It was incredible, to say the least. Even with my mom's love for traditions, we all knew we had to see more of the world. I've been back in Slovenia twice since 2016, and I've always liked being here. So when I started looking at universities in the area, I quickly decided Ljubljana was going to be my home for the coming 3-4 years. 

Not going to lie, it was tough saying goodbye to my family. But other than that, I had no problem moving away.

I've always had friends back in Toronto, but I was never that close to someone. I didn't have a best friend.

When I applied for university here, about 9 months ago, I started looking for more international students online. And then I met Andrea, who's from Germany, on Twitter. It was nice to finally have a close friendship.

So yeah, it's been nice living here. Except for Jan, or whatever his name is. And his dumb guitar. 

I step into my appartement and slam the door shut, since no one in this complex seems to care anyway. I just want to get a good nights sleep. 

After I do my skincare and brush my teeth, I change into my PJ's. I fall asleep within 5 minutes after reading a chapter of a new book.

I wake up in peace, surprisingly. It's 9:28AM. I didn't wake up last night. Not a single time. And no, it's not because these earplugs are so good (they're not), it's because there was no music being played next door. Not that it has been every night, but I still can't help but wonder if it's because I said something about it. Feeling like a proud Karen now.

I put on a comfy sweater and sweatpants, make myself some breakfast; toast with Nutella and an iced coffee like always, and turn on the tv. 

Shortly after, someone knocks on my door. What. The. Hell.

Respectfully, no one has knocked on my door since I moved in. Well, except for the pizza delivery guy. And the sushi delivery guy. And that one time I got ramen... but that's not the point.

I sigh and put down my plate while I wipe the crumbs of toast off my lip. I look through the peep hole. 

You can't be serious.

It's Jan. 

"Hi Delilah," he waves shortly. I almost fall back, how did he know I was watching?

"What do you want?"

"You opening the door would be a good first step," I can't help but smile. Stop it.

"I'm busy. Come back later," 

"Come on!"

"And it's LILAH, by the way!" I close the peep hole and walk away from the door.

"You said you would talk to me!" I hear him yelling. I turn up the sound of the TV. Is it too late to start browsing for new apartments?