Desire - Jan Peteh

The Social Media Stalker

I order a large pepperoni pizza. I know I probably shouldn't, since I'm really low on money and I don't start my new job until next week. But.. I also have nothing in my fridge. So be it.

While waiting for my food to arrive, I decide to do a little digging. Not that Jan has made me curious. Of course not. I just think it's useful to know who's living next to you. And especially if there's loads of information about him on the internet.

I first find his Instagram page, which has over 30K followers. Not bad, but not as much as I expected. His posts are pretty classic. A lot of them with the band. And I must say, his long hair era was not it. At least, not for me.

Even though this page REALLY is nothing special, I make the choice to follow his account anyway.

He doesn't seem to have a social media presence outside of his Insta though.

I look at their Twitter, the band's official Insta and watch some interviews before someone knocks on my door.

A whole hour has passed since I started searching. I didn't realise it was that long..

I open up the door and take my pizza.

As much as I was enjoying prying in my neighbours life.. I'm really not like this. I should probably stop until I take it too far.

I feel a bit restless, so after finishing my food I quickly change my clothes into something a little more presentable and take my headphones. I'll just go get some fresh air and listen to their other album.

The other album, called "Demoni" really is something different. I like almost all the songs on there, it's more my taste. I'm honestly thinking about going to one of their concerts. It's not like there's anything more entertaining on in Ljubljana.

Also, there's no way I'll admit any of this to Jan. Ever. I will not give him the satisfaction of knowing I actually like the music he has been blasting through my walls.

A notification on my phone comes in. It's my mom. She usually texts around this time, since the time difference is about 6 hours. So it's early afternoon in Canada.

Mom: hey, just checking in to see how you're doing!

Mom: did you get the package I sent you? It should be in by now

Me: yes, sorry I forgot to tell you, it came in yesterday. Thanks again for sending it over :)

When I was on the plane to Ljubljana, I immediately realised that, even though we made about a million lists, I forgot to take some stuff with me. My mom was so kind to send it over to me, thankfully. It were just some clothes and my childhood stuffed animal, but it still meant a lot.

Mom: of course ❤️

Me: how are you doing? How's dad and Theo?

Mom: your dad and I took the day off and we're on our way to you aunt right now to have a barbecue.

Mom: Theo is fine. He just sent me a bunch of pictures at camp, I'll forward them to you.

Man, I miss having barbecues at my aunt's house. I can't believe I've only been away for two weeks and I'm already feeling super homesick. It gets worse when mom texts me. Of course, I can't forbid her to talk to me, that would be ridiculous. But sometimes it does make me wonder why I made that choice to move so far away.

I just wanted, needed, an adventure. But an adventure this big? I don't know..

After about half an hour of walking around I make my way back to my appartement. I have to admit, I'm kind of regretting turning down Drea's movie night proposal. You have no idea how lonely life gets until you're in a foreign country all by yourself, and you have absolutely nothing to do.

I have been doing a lot of exploring the past weeks, and I think it's safe to say I've seen almost all of Ljubljana. I've checked out the university campus, been to museums, seen most of the tourist attractions, been to some local markets. Drea and I even already have a favourite restaurant, as I mentioned earlier.

So now it's just a week long of sitting in my appartement by myself, trying not to spend too much money until I start my new job. I'll be working as a delivery driver for a sushi place. Not too fancy, I know. But I need the money, need to learn some Slovenian, and I want to get to know the city as fast as I can. And I just figured this would be the best way to do it.

I'll only be working 3 half days in the beginning and 2 nights once I start uni, but it pays well so I'm happy.

I eventually fall asleep on my couch at around 10PM. I feel like a grandma.

The next few days are, honestly, uneventful. A little depressing, even. Things went back to how they used to be. I meet Andrea at least every two days to gossip or have lunch, even though I have absolutely nothing to say. She introduces me to a new friend who will also be attending the university. Her name is Nora but I honestly don't like her very much.

I listen to Joker Out's music. It helps me learn the language. It especially helps with pronunciation.

I haven't heard from Jan in about 4 days now. Just like before, we don't run into each other. He comes home at 4AM one Saturday, loudly. I sort of feel like I want to check in on him, but I don't think it's my place to do that. Especially when I hear he isn't alone.

I stay inside the entire day on Sunday. I feel like Sundays are meant for that. Then Monday morning I realise there's nothing in the fridge. Again. There's not much money left in my bank account, but thankfully the sushi place pays me every week and I start the day after tomorrow.

During my tiresome stroll through the grocery store that afternoon, I remember I should probably call my mom again. So that's the last thing I do before heading back to my appartement.