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He doesn't know the effect

he has on me

leaving me for almost too long,

but always returning.

He doesn't realize my distress

stretching for an imaginary throne

as if he is a prize

I have no right to own.

He doesn't laugh along,

he's no suck, no fool

telling it as it is,

as it should be said.

He doesn't need to know

the insecurities that cloud my mind

as I hold back my attention seeking impulses,

lies created for my gain.

He shouldn't read these poems

a steady stream of teenage doubts

each piece contradicting another

as I figure out where when and how to continue.

~~~~~

3/5-11/13

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