Imagine Type: cute/sad
Warnings: anxiety attack
Status: Y/n and Chris are together.
Y/n's P.O.V
I hate parties. I never could bring myself to stay at a party for the whole time. I don't like being surrounded by a ton of people. Especially ones I didn't know that well.
I'm currently at a party that Chris convinced me to come to but I'm regretting it. I lost Chris for what has seemed like hours.
I can feel my chest caving in. My knees are shaking and I physically can't stand up straight. The urge to cry is overwhelming and I wanna give in but I have to at least from a room first.
I can't even find Nick or Matt. I feel so alone. I wanna go home so bad but I didn't drive here, I rode in with the guys so I'm stuck.
I feel the room spinning as I quickly try to find a empty room, in which I can lock myself in. The music is eardrum shattering as people's voices get louder.
I finally find a bathroom to lock myself in. I shut the door behind me and lock it. I lean my back against the shower door, gripping the front parts of my hair.
It feels like I can't breath as my body falls down to the floor. I pull my knees up to my chest as I begin to rock back and forth.
"Breath Y/n. You're going to be okay." I tell myself softly.
I take some deep breaths as I feel my throat start to close up. I knew the only way I could be released from this panic is to cry. And I don't wanna cry.
Before I knew it, the tears were running down my cheeks. My mouth was open to cry but no sound came out.
I became a master at this. I could be crying for hours and no one would be able to tell.
I felt my Apple Watch start to vibrate since I had it on silent. It was warning me that my heart rate was high and that I needed to sit down. However I was already doing so.
I wrap my arms around myself as I hide my face in between my chest and knees.
Just then someone knocks on the bathroom door. Not being able to move or speak, I just sit here frozen in place; hoping they would go away once they see the door's locked.
"Y/n?! You in there?" I hear a voice from the other side.
I just shake my head back and forth. I wanna speak but I know I won't be able to. I hear the door knob shake as I hear the tumblers being undone.
I hear the door open as I just stay with my knees in my chest.
"Y/n." I recognize the person now as his voice isn't muffled by the door anymore. "Y/n look at me."
My face is softly pulled up from its hiding spot to meet Chris's worried expression. This is the first time he's seeing me cry and my heart sinks.
I shake my head back and forth, trying to hide my face once more but him wouldn't allow me. Chris sits down in front of me and pulls me into a hug.
He rubs my back in a attempt to calm me down.
"Deep breaths." Chris whispers to me.
My head is pounding as my chest still feels tight. I'm physically shaking and just wanting this attack to be over. After I get choked on my own spit, I start to cough.
Chris pats my back as I try to catch my breath.
"Fuck." I cuss softly.
Chris rocks me back and forth as I begin to control my breathing once again.
"My alarm went off telling me your heart rate was up." Chris tells me.
"What?" I asked, my voice kind of clouding from my nose being clogged.
"I synced my phone with your watch just in case you ever got lost or something and it went crazy when your heart rate went sky high." Chris explains. "I didn't know what was going on, if you were having a allergic reaction to something or what."
"No." I said.
"Do you know what made your heart rate sky rocket then?" He asked.
"I... I started having a panic attack." I said just above a whisper.
Chris holds me a little tighter.
"I was trying to find a place to cry since I couldn't calm myself down with breathing." I explain. "I'm sorry for crying."
"Why are you apologizing for crying know that it would help you?" Chris asked me.
"I just... don't like people seeing me cry." I said wiping my nose with my sleeve. "You were the last person I wanted to see me like this."
"Y/n I'm here for you. My idea of you hasn't changed just from seeing you cry. You're still one of the strongest people I know." Chris says pulling me up and looking at him.
"Wait... how'd you even get in?" I asked. "I locked the door."
Chris reached into his pocket and pulls out two of my bobby-pins.
"A little trick I learned from you." Chris smiles at me.
