I really have a lot of thoughts right now. But I just hope for more time together. You know this already, but I definitely want us to be together. I feel bad that you may not feel the same way, because I feel like when I say I miss you, or that I want this or that, you feel pressure and I don't want to add to your pressure.
I'm not sure if I should wait for you to figure out what you want and possibly hurt myself in the process, or if I should just end this now because you're so unsure.
The thing I'm worried about is that you're unsure whether you even like me. I understand confusion about wanting to be in a committed relationship, but are you confused whether you like me or not?
I'm scared to let you go because I don't want to be lonely again.
You really brought me so much joy and happiness, but I've cried almost everyday for the past three days thinking about you not wanting to be with me.
If you knew for sure you didn't like me, then maybe I could move on. But this uncertainty is inconsistent and it's very triggering for me.
I can't continue a relationship that feels so unstable, but I don't want to let you go.
I either have to make peace with the fact that you might not want me, or I have to leave to protect myself. I don't want to leave, but sometimes the hardest thing to do is the best for both parties.
I really like you and I wish you knew if you liked me. It's painful to think you like someone so much and they can't reciprocate. I know you don't want to hurt me but it does hurt me when you are inconsistent and unsure. I miss our flirty texts and you getting me out of my comfort zone. I just miss you a lot. I miss your kisses and your hands; cuddling and just being together.
The fact that I have insecurities and that you're unsure is really throwing me for a spiral. I want this to work so bad and I'm willing to do anything, but I can't cry myself to sleep every night. That's unhealthy.
I'm not sure what to do. I just don't want to lose you.
I hope in this new year you can figure out what you want and find what you're looking for because I found what I wanted in you. Which makes it so hard to know I may not be able to have what I want. You really are everything I ever wanted, so this does hurt me quite a bit. You're not a bad person, I just wish you knew what you wanted.
I'm mourning the loss of what we have and what we could have because I know this may not work out.
I get sad at night and I've been very sad the past few nights.
I can't wait for therapy.
