There is no greater pain than doubt. And right now, I was doubting the life I had built with the man I loved, which is the greatest pain of all. My knife slammed into the wooden countertop again and again, cutting jagged slices through the potatoes I had just dug up. I'll have a whole man, or none at all. My final words rang in my ears. Guilt welled up inside of me, threatening to overtake me, but I had to be strong for the sake of my children crying in the next room.
Did I doubt the meaning behind my words? No. I was relieved to see Fergus gone, but I had not anticipated the feeling of emptiness that would come with his absence. I watched the door, hoping the man I had married would return to me. It felt as though I had been watching him slip away for years, and I had allowed it. I made excuses for him, and bargained with myself, but it was all for naught. I knew then that I had lost him and the life we had built together.
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Luceo Non Uro || Outlander
FanficI shine, not burn. This sequel to Je Suis Prest will follow the next chapter of Fergus and Marsali's lives in North Carolina. Figuring out parenthood in the midst of war, Fergus battling his demons, and plenty of romance (I mean, look at how many ch...
