A Blue Mountain Memory

I

Cora's hands had lived two lives and taken one. 

Once sliced, dried, and calloused– now encased in intricate black lace, resting gently against her stiff body. Her knees locked, unaware of passing time, ignoring the sun's steady descent. Although many years had passed, Cora saw his warm smile. She heard his laugh, smelled his scent, and felt his arms wrapped around her once delicate frame. She recalled the way his eyes crinkled as he laughed. She yearned to smile at the thought, but her solemn face now hung too heavy to lift. Time's burden had added immense weight to her bones. So instead of smiling at the thought of him, her eyes remained fixed on his name engraved on the marble slab erected before her.

Cora's eyes finally moved from the humble monument towards the boy. Positioned in front of another headstone with his cap in hand, the boy's face did not alter. Just like Cora, the boy stared stoically at the stone, maintaining a distant concentration. She understood that he too found a sense of reverie, allowing himself to be lured away into the false reality of his past life. Cora thought to herself... living inside your memories often bested any other existence. How can you not revel in the delusions of past experiences? Of course, humans are damned to be haunted by choice memories– but that is exactly what they are, choice. Even those we dread to remember are still the ones we remember in the way we choose. All of them nonexistent. All of them figments of our imaginations. Yet sometimes, if you focus your mind enough, the sensations and emotions of years ago can still re-emerge through these siren visions– exactly as they appeared and felt in another time, whether they were as they truly were. 

That's when she heard his laugh. Not the boy's, but the man she mourned. His laugh echoed through the cavities within her ears as if he stood right beside her. Finally, she moved, turning her head to the left hoping for just one second that maybe he stood right there. Maybe she lay dreaming and he knelt beside her bed, stroking her hair, whispering words of comfort. But when Cora's eyes refocused, she saw only an empty street, saturated with orange and pink as the sun continued disappearing beneath the horizon. Cora looked back to the boy who remained in his trance. It's funny, she thought, sometimes he reminded her of the man. Her gratitude for the boy swelled inside her heart as she remembered her blessings. She remained alive, and so did he. 

Cora's eyes fell back upon the marble stone. She noticed the greenery beginning to grow from underneath the stone's base and the dirt that settled within its cracks. Suddenly, she felt the boy standing beside her. His strong hand laid softly over hers and she surrendered to his loving grasp. The pair stood in front of the stone in quiet observation and contemplation. The sound of crickets and the trees swaying in the wind distracted Cora's mind, allowing her memories to consume her. Cora closed her eyes, focusing on the surrounding natural sounds that carried her back to Lake Ren. Her heavy, elegantly layered, mourning dress transformed into a shabbily brown, shin-length, button-up set with weak, puffy sleeves. Her boots barely held together from overuse and lack of proper treatment. Her hair ran down her back in two neat braids that slapped across her shoulders as she ran through the woods. 

Cora's legs began aching as she raced past the trees towards the water. Upon hitting the sand, she threw her arms out and her head back as she soaked in the sunlight– embracing the sounds of the lapping water before her. She collapsed with sheer contentment, burying her fingers in the warm sand and feeling around for smooth rocks. As her fingers wedged deeper into the earth, digging for hidden treasure, a branch snapped behind her. Cora's heart ceased beating as her body stiffened. She opened one eye, keeping the other one shut tight. Cora slowly drew a deep breath in, convincing herself to launch from the ground with her fists before her. On her count to three, Cora propelled herself up into the air as she turned to face the woods. With her fists ready before her scrawny figure, Cora looked through the trees to identify the predator. Cora's throat grew dry as her eyes frantically darted from bush to tree to rock– but still nothing appeared. As she lowered her fists and relaxed her shoulders, Cora finally allowed herself to swallow. Just as she began turning towards the water, another branch snapped and Cora's eyes fell upon Elwood Lew, standing in the tree line with his gun and a smile. 

Relief washed over Cora's body and her hands began shaking from the receding, yet overwhelming, sensation that she had just escaped death by some monstrous forest creature. Elwood– the apparent forest creature– silently waved her over, motioning to his hunting rifle. Cora wiped her sandy hands on her dress and ran over to her friend. The pair trekked silently back into the woods. Following behind Elwood, Cora squatted behind a tree he chose. The two sat patiently, allowing no sound to escape their excited bodies, and waiting for their prey to emerge. Cora watched Elwood as he propped his gun on a nearby rock, resting on it the weight of his body. She watched his strong hand hover over the trigger as his gray eyes focused forward. His tongue ran over his lips and a bead of sweat rolled down his temple onto his weathered, white shirt. Cora watched as the sun beat down on his sandy-blonde hair, illuminating each strand. 

Cora understood why every girl in town had fallen in love with Elwood. She considered Elwood to be an objectively attractive boy. For a fifteen-year-old, he stood as the tallest in all of Mount Baylin. Six feet and three inches with broad shoulders, Elwood towered over his classmates and even his own father. As she continued watching him, Cora noticed his innate silence. Although the pair spent most of their days together, they did so in a deafening quiet. Any talking typically came from Cora and consisted of her complaints towards Birdie Call's constant torment. Elwood simply sat and listened-- but listen he did. He had a talent for making a person feel heard. 

Despite Cora's recognition of Elwood's looks and charm, she laughed at the idea of ever loving him. Cora did not stand against love, nor did she view Elwood as unworthy. She just simply struggled to view him in any way other than as her companion. At the age of thirteen, Cora understood that she would have to find love and marry one day. She did not disdain the prospect, but she also found little joy in it. Perhaps the expectation of it was what turned Cora off from dreaming of marital bliss. If it was not her idea, then it simply was not a good one. Truthfully, Cora struggled with the idea of having to share her bed with another person, unable to sprawl as she pleased. Nonetheless, Cora accepted her fate as some man's future wife.

Cora's mind re-focused when a sound in the distance reached her ears. She followed Elwood's eye line to see a medium sized buck looking out towards the shoreline of the lake. Elwood's long finger slowly pressed against the trigger as Cora's fingers dug into her ear canals, anxiously anticipating the rifle's boom. With another blink, Elwood pulled the trigger. A wave of sound rippled through the trees, sending birds scattering towards the clouds. His head turned to Cora and his smile made her stomach feel odd. Elwood's crooked right tooth, sitting just over the left one, caught Cora's eye. Her heart fluttered in the slightest bit. She figured it was merely the excitement from the kill.

The pair stood up and cautiously approached the animal in its stillness. Cora felt relieved the beast had already expired. Her least favorite part about hunting was having to kill the animal up close, but she knew that was always the right thing to do. Sometimes killing the beast up close was necessary, no matter how difficult it felt. Cora and Elwood each grabbed a pair of legs and began dragging the buck home. Cora knew her mother and father would be relieved to eat some meat this week.

When the two reached the end of the woods and the beginning of the dirt road, Cora started telling Elwood about her rock collection. She detailed each rock, its color, its shape, its name, and its ability. Although Elwood had heard this spiel a thousand times he still smiled as he listened.