Losing You (a.banks x y/n)

Chapter 14

I wake up Sunday morning with puffy red eyes. I make my way out to the living and sit down on the couch. Theres a knock on the door. I walk over and open the door. My breath hitches as I see Mindy standing there. She walks past me and into the apartment.

"This is a cute little place you got here." She says as she looks around, snickering at some things she sees.

"Mindy what are you doing here?" I ask, nervous about what she might do.

"I came to tell you that you will do it today. You're breaking up with him today. And if you don't, what happened last night won't be the worst thing that has happened to you." She stand in front of me, and then takes another look around before leaving.

I ponder on it all day. How can I do it without it being too heartbreaking. I don't want to do it, I've put it off hoping that Mindy would just find somebody new to obsess over but she didn't. I love Adam, but I can't take this anymore.

At 9pm, I dial Adams number into the phone. Mindy said it has to be done today, or the party wouldn't be the worst thing she did and I feared how much farther she'd go. It rings a few times before he picks up.

"Hey baby." He greets, and my heart breaks a little.

"Adam. I think we need to take a break, I'm just too overwhelmed, I hope you understand." I don't even let him get a word in. I hang up and start crying. He calls back, but I ignore it. Why did Mindy have to pick me and Adam. Why did Charlie have be a dick. Why did I have to be such a baby and let her do this to me?

I'm laying in my bed, still crying. A part of me asks why didn't just tell somebody. Maybe it would've been better if I had. Maybe after the first time Mindy touched me, I could've gotten her suspended. It's too late now. I've dug myself a hole and now I'm stuck in it. It's 11pm and there's a knock on the door. I put pants and a sweater on, so nobody can see some of the bruises and cute she gave me.

"Adam what are you doing here?" I say as I open the door.

"You do not get to call me, and tell me that you think we need to take a break and then hang up without letting me talk and then not answer me when I call back!" He walks past me into the apartment and I shut the door. I walk to the other side of the island. "What has happened?" He asks, "You've been distant, not acting like yourself basically since the first week we started at Eden Hall. You aren't as close to me as you were this summer." I swallow hard. "What is happening to us, y/n? I feel like I'm losing you an- and I don't know how to stop it." His voice breaks. "Scooter told me that when he found you at his party, you were covered in bruises and cuts?" Adam walks towards me but I just back up.

"He wasn't supposed to say anything. He doesn't know what he saw." I mumble.

"Don't lie to me. Y/n, what's wrong. What happening, is somebody doing something to you? No, I know something happened to you, and you're going to tell me what. Did Emily and Lola do something?"  He asks, voice breaking again. 'Tell him. Tell him what's been happening. He can help you.'

"No. I just." I pause, and look at the floor. "I need a break Adam, I want us to break up." I look up, and he looks hurt.

"Is it something I did? Or didn't do?" He asks, tears in his eyes.

"No. It's nothing you did. It's me, I just, can't deal with everything right now." I can tell he's not overly buying what Im saying, he's fighting his thoughts inside.

"Okay. If it's time alone that you need, I will give you all the time in the world, for you to get better or whatever it is you need to do. But promise me, that somebody isn't doing or saying stuff to you. That this isn't some sort of spiral and that when I leave, you'll do something bad to yourself." He hits the counter with his hand, whether out of frustration or just hurt.

"Mhm."

"Y/n, I need to hear words. I need to hear you say it."

"Im not going to promise you anything." I mumble and I look up at him, tears in my eyes.

"Y/n. There's obviously something that happened. Please just let me help you, don't push me away." He leaned against the island. "Come on y/n, I-" he pauses. "I love you." This is the first time he's said this. My heart breaks. 'I love you too.' Is all I want to say, no it's not all I want to say. 'I'm doing this because I love you too much. I don't want to see you get hurt because I didn't follow orders.'

"Just please go Adam. Don't make this harder than it already is." I turn around, not wanting to watch him go. I hear him sigh.

"No." Is all he says.

"Adam.." I mumble under my breath, just loud enough that he can hear.

"I want you to tell me what's going on!" He shouts.

"I can't!" I shout back. I hear footsteps, and then I feel his arms wrap around me. I start crying.

"You can. Just tell me, what happened and who did it." He says.

"I-" I pause. I almost tell him. I know I should tell him. I wiggle out of his arms, and walk away. "Just please go Adam. Please." I don't look at him, I can't.

"Fine, I'll leave." I hear him walk to the door and I hear it open. "I don't want to lose you, not forever. So if this is what you need, I'll give it to you, in hopes that one day soon, I get you back." He walks out and shuts the door and I fall to the floor. I sit there for a bit before I get up and walk into the bathroom. I take the hoodie off. I look at every scar Mindy gave me. Each one a reminder. Each one I took is one that somebody else didn't get. I look up, and see myself.  I don't even recognize me in the mirror. I look sickly. I fall back onto the floor and cry again. How could I let this get to this point? I lost my boyfriend, and I'm losing myself.

I finally crawl into bed again, and I lay there awake. I need to pull myself together for tomorrow. Everybody will know, and they are going to ask all kinds of questions. Mindy will ask, and she'll finally get what she wants. I wish I could've been stronger. If only I had told somebody when it first started.