Losing You (a.banks x y/n)

Chapter 22

"Hey boys!" I say, as I pull up beside the sidewalk they were standing on. Luis hops in front and Dwayne and Ken get in the back.

"Thanks for inviting us y/n." Luis says, looking at me.

"No problem. I promised you guys that we would do it, and there's no better time than now." I smile and pull away. We have the radio on and Dwayne starts singing the song, which gives all of us a surprise.

"Jeez Dwayne, I didn't know you had that in you." Ken says, laughing after the song ends.

"It's like a crime not to be able to sing in my town. Southern charm you know?" Dwayne replies which results in us all laughing.

We get back to the apartment before Adam and his crew do so we go up and wait for them. Everybody ends up just setting their bags in my room and decided we will just sleep out in the living room.

"Okay so I did order pizza for us. I told them to deliver it around 6." I inform the group as Adam and his crew arrive. I turn to look towards the door and Adam smiles at me. I return with a smile and turn back around to the fruit and vegetables I was cutting up. I knew some people wouldn't want a whole bunch of shitty food so I was going to be a good host by having lots of options.

"Hey." Adam says as he comes up beside me. "You want any help?" He offers. I look over at him.

"Nah I'm almost done here, go find a spot for us to sit out in the living room." I give him a smile and put the last of the cut up fruit in the container. He nods, and walks away as I snap the container shut and walk it over to the fridge. There's a knock on the door, and I walk over to it, making sure to look through the peephole before opening the door.

As we ate and watched movies, everybody was in their own little conversations. I looked around at everybody, realizing just how much I missed them. Missed this.

That's when Mindy flashes in and out of my mind. All of a sudden, it's like I hit a wall and I feel like I can't breathe.

"I'll be right back." I whisper as normally as I can to Adam and I get up out of my spot next to him and go to the bathroom. I shut the door behind me, and sit in the edge of the tub. I breathe in and out, reminding myself that it's over. I unzip the sweater I had put on and take it off. I stand up and look at myself in the mirror. Tears slowly start falling from my eyes.

Knock, knock.

I sniffle a little more loudly than I would've liked before asking who was there.

"It's Luis. Hey are you okay?" He asks, closer to the door. I unlock it and open it for him. He sees my teary cheeks and walks in shutting the door behind him. He immediately opens his arms and I don't hesitate to walk into them.

"It's okay. You are here and safe, y/n." He whispers as I softly cry a little more into the hoodie he's wearing. "You don't have to tell any of us what happened, we just want to know if you're okay."

"Can we sit?" I ask between breaths and we lose to the floor. He wraps an arm around me and I lean into him.

"I don't want to let her win, she still has control of me and she isn't even here." I begin. "I mean I just had a panic attack at the thought of her. When I left, I was having them all the time. And they were just getting better when we had to come back. Then, I had to see her. And it was the worst. She knew I was there." Tears begin streaming down my down my face again.

After a few seconds of silence, Luis speaks up

"Do you want a little advice or just comfort?" Luis asks, rubbing his hand up and down my arm.

"When did you start being the advice giver, I thought that was me." I look up at him, saying it with a small laugh that causes him to smile. "Give me some advice dr Luis."

"She only has control of you if you let her have the power. You just need to learn to not give her that power, take it back. It's not going to be easy either, and it's going to take a while, but you won't be alone. You have me, Adam, Charlie, the girls. Everybody that is out there, is here for you. I mean, you should've seen how frantic Adam was when he realized you were gone." Luis says, and I sit there listening to what he has to say.

Luis was always the one that was misunderstood. He had a cocky confident personality and that's what drove away a lot of people. But when you got to know him, he was soft, and kind.

"It's not always going to be good, but not everyday will be bad either. Even if you have to take it one day, one hour or one minute at a time, all of us will be there cheering you on for every step you take on this journey. We all love you." Luis finishes, and I take a moment to soak up everything he said.

"What have you done with my friend Luis?" I say sarcastically, and he laughs. "Thank you, Luis. One day, when I'm able to, I will tell you what happened. But just not tonight."

"It's okay. I'd be fine without ever hearing what happened, because even though what happened does matter, what matters most is you survived it. You are here." Luis wraps his other arm around me, giving me a tight hug. "You know back when we were in the locker room, before we played Iceland for gold?" Luis asks and I hum in response. "I think I cherish meeting you the most, out of everybody."

I want to start crying when Luis tells me that, but I hold it in.

"I love you Luis. We really do need to hang out more." I sit up and look at him. He gives me a smile. There's a knock on the door again. I open it up and Adam stands in front of me.

"I was just coming to see if you were alright." He speaks, looking at me and looking at Luis. Adam look back at me, and I think he notices the red around my eyes.

"Yeah I'm alright now." I tell Adam and I turn around and give Luis another hug. "Thank you Luis, for the comfort and advice." I say in a lower voice, but both of them heard. I let go and walk out of the bathroom and down the hall. Adam follows me out to the kitchen.

"Are you sure you're okay?" He asks, looking around my face for a tell.

"Not overall, but for right now I am." I give him a half smile, and he hugs me. After a few seconds, we pull apart. I lean in, and so does he. We kiss as if we were suffocating and the other person was air. It sent a wave of warmth throughout me, and made me feel normal, like myself again for a few seconds. We pull apart and look at eachother for a few seconds, smiling. "Let's get back out to the living room." I say finally, taking his hand in mine and I lead him back to where we were sat before.

I take another look around the living room. And I tell myself I have one thing she'll never have:

The Ducks.