I thought I could trust you || Tom Kaulitz & Bill Kaulitz

its all my fault

Tom came running in the bathroom, bill must've called him. "what the fuck eleyn! are you kidding me!?" i couldn't look him in his eyes. he came closer and closer and with every step he took i got more scared for my whole life. He grabbed my chin so i needed to look him in his eyes. "Look at me eleyn! Why did you do this!" "i don't know." i couldn't say anything but that. I couldn't open my mouth anymore. Nothing came out, not a single word. He grabbed me by my arm and got me out of this horrible sex building. The images of him and this ugly whore couldn't get out of my head. "why did you kiss with this girl." i asked him, without any feelings. i felt nothing anymore. I couldn't cry, neither could i be angry. i was frustrated , like i was a little child that got lost in the supermarket. "what do you mean, eleyn?" he asked me, like he knew nothing anymore. "You kissed this ugly whore, you had your filthy hands on her ass and you both sticked your tongues in eachother mouths, don't ask me 'what do you mean eleyn' you know exactly what i mean! you ruined my whole life, why can't you just get another girl und fuck up her whole body, life und future! You're such a monster. i hate you with all my life, tom kaulitz."

                             - sight of tom kaulitz -

"... i hate you with all my life, tom kaulitz." eleyn said to me. I really did ruin her whole life, she has every right to hate me. but i love her, and i will never let her go. Even if she wants me to, i won't. she's the love of my life, i know i really made her miserable and fucked up her whole life. She will never forgive me, never ever. "do you even know what i would do for you? eleyn it's like i known you for my whole life!" "then act like you would do anything for me! you hit me, fuck my life up and never give me any sign of love! i know what you talked with bill about, ayla heard everything." fuck. she knows it. "so you know it huh? are you happy now?" "no, because you're a monster. how can you love me after all that you've done to me! I just hate you! i can't believe that you actually have feelings for me, do you like to hurt me that much that you caught feelings ? what the fuck tom. A few hours ago you kissed another girl while i tried to end everything, you can't even remember what happened! I can't believe you anymore. I never did and never can."

———

sorry that it's so short but i am very tired i was on a trip the whole day with my dad 😭