Cruel Summer | ✓

chapter six

It's hard to sleep in other people's houses. My body and brain won't shut off completely, as though they're keeping me primed to respond to a threat, and by six a.m. I am wide awake. The sun is up already, pouring through the skylight and bathing the room in the kind of bright, pretty light that comes after sunrise on a clear summer's day. I lie in it for a while, tipped upside down in the bed so I can see the sky through the window. It captures a polaroid-perfect square of blue, not even the slightest wisp of a cloud in sight: today will be a hot one. I plan to spend it in the water, by the water, on the water.

I don't know what the protocol is for taking a shower in someone else's house at this time of day. Is it a totally unreasonable hour? Is it weird? I know Lou said I could shower, but it feels wrong to sneak into her bathroom and get naked, to use her soap all over my body, to make myself smell like her.

I check my cell phone. The battery is critically low. I'm amazed it survived the night at all — I am long overdue for an upgrade, something I keep putting off because I can't bring myself to drop hundreds of dollars on something new when my current phone still does what it needs to do. Just ... slower. Less reliably. The fact that it managed to get me to Fisher without it dying on me several times at random or the location services packing in is a miracle. The chance of this last ten percent of battery getting me back to my hotel is slim but I know the way from here. I'm home.

There's a new message in Greg's Gals. Tay's awake even though it's five o'clock in Los Angeles, selling her soul for a good job and a great paycheck.

What happened?? she texts. You left us hanging !! are you okay?

Came to visit my uncle's old cabin, snuck into the garden and got caught by the neighbor (the MILFest of all MILFs btw #obsessed) and we went for drinks and i stayed the night at her place

Not in her bed unfortunately, I add, because I know that will be Tay's next question.

Oh my god!! You absolute player!! Nice ;)

I snort out loud at the thought. I'm the farthest thing from a player and Tay knows it. I've had three relationships in my life, and when I fall, I fall hard. And when my relationships eventually fall apart, so do I. I don't do casual and I fucking hate break-ups.

I wish lol, I text back.

Gaby joins the chat with: Wait are you trying to sleep with someone who knew you when you were a kid & she was an adult? Please say no. She adds a string of grimacing faces.

She moved next door when i was 17 is that allowed

Okay that's okay I guess, Gaby says.

Also i barely even remember her from when i was here. I was out being an awesome super cool teenager remember!! You're talking to the queen of the lake here guys. I lie with my legs in the air as I text, my head hanging off the edge of the bed. Although turns out her daughter kinda "dated" my little brother the last time we were there

Ohhhhhhh, Tay texts, she's a MILF milf. Like, she's got a fully grown up kid?? We're not talking about a 25yo with a toddler??

Ummmmm no. she's like 40?

I wait for judgment. I love my friends but I sometimes think they don't really get me. They're both straight and well-adjusted and they know what path their lives are following. I'm out here winging it and developing crushes on people my parents used to know.

Tay's response comes in first: wyd talking to us, go get that sugar mama ;) ;)

Gaby sends a cry-laughing emoji and says, I don't get you lol but you do you. That's good enough for me. She's never been one for this kind of girl talk like Tay is, unless it's about her own infrequent forays into the world of dating.