"How are you?" Areum asks and you shrug, trying to force a smile that doesn't quite reach your eyes.
You sigh, your shoulders sagging. "I don't know. These past few days have been tough. I don't think this break is doing me any good, I just keep missing him more."
"Why did you even decide to take this break?" Areum's voice is gentle, but there's a curiosity underlying her question.
"I thought it would give us both some space, you know? Time to figure things out, to clear our heads. But it feels like all I'm doing is replaying memories and second-guessing everything."
You're thinking of Heeseung while you sip on your coffee, trying to stop yourself from missing him too much. The two of you have been getting into so many arguments that you started questioning whether your relationship was still healthy.
Heeseung suggested the break, and though you reluctantly agreed, it's been harder than you anticipated.
"Taking a break can be both a blessing and a curse." She sighs, giving you a faint smile. "You can either discover that the time apart brings you closer together, or you realize that the distance reveals the cracks that were already there."
"I just hate that every time I close my eyes, I see his smile." You shake your head, trying to stop your tears from falling. "I cannot let him go."
"You don't have to." Areum's words are a soothing balm to your wounded heart. "You're allowed to miss him, to feel confused and hurt. But taking this time doesn't mean it's the end."
"It's just that the uncertainty is killing me. What if he decides that being apart is better?"
"Those 'what ifs' can drive anyone crazy if you let them take over. You should just take things one step at a time," Areum says, her voice calm and reassuring. "And maybe being honest with your feelings is the best thing you can do right now."
Tracing the rim of your coffee cup with your finger, you wonder if you've truly been honest with yourself about what you want.
When you go back home, the only thing you can think about is the empty space beside you on the couch where he used to sit. The apartment feels both quieter and more suffocating without his presence.
Sometimes you find yourself instinctively reaching for your phone to text him, only to remember that he's not just a text or a call away right now. It makes you realize how deeply intertwined your lives had become and now his absence feels like a void that's impossible to fill.
As you curl up on the couch, the scent of his cologne still lingering on the cushions, you realize how much you miss him. But it's not just the good times you miss—the arguments too and everything that led to this break.
It hurts you to know he needed this distance, that the cracks in your relationship had become significant enough for both of you to step back.
"Why do we always end up hurting the ones we love?" you whisper to the empty room. You're not expecting an answer, yet the question lingers in the air and you find yourself lost in thought
You wonder if you listened enough, if you communicated clearly. The arguments and disagreements replay in your mind, and you wish you could go back and change the words that were said, the moments that hurt.
A sudden text interrupts your reverie, and your heart skips a beat. Your eyes dart to your phone, and for a split second, you forget how to breathe.
I'm outside your apartment. Can we talk? You read it over and over again, trying to absorb the words that have appeared on your screen. It's him, the person you've been missing, the one whose absence has been a constant ache in your chest.
