Cole & Jamie

Chapter 25

I spent the next twenty minutes doing my best not to fall apart. And it was not an easy task. I plastered on the brightest smile I could muster and I said goodbye to his friends. Neal was the saddest to see us go. He hugged me tight, and whispered, "See you next time, Jamie," in my ear. It was almost enough to move me to tears, but I swallowed it down. I already felt dumb no need to make myself look dumb as well.

"See you next time," I whispered, knowing that there may never be a next time.

Ramona looked at me with a concern she didn't voice. It confirmed in my mind that she knew, but at least she was nice enough not to mention it.

Meanwhile, I felt like I was going to be sick.

By the time our car was ready, I could barely look Cole in the eye. Unfortunately, he didn't share the same sentiment; I could feel him boring a hole in the side of my head. Once we got in the towncar I slid as far across the seat as I could comfortably get, angling my body away from his. The partition was raised for our privacy, the pending conversation would need it.

Sadness and rage mounted in my chest as we drove in silence– at Cole, myself, this whole situation. There were so many little details, things that I pushed to the back of my mind even though I knew something about them didn't feel right. The ignored phone calls, the rumors about the two of them, the thought that Cole Walters wouldn't have been seeing a single person before he was with me. I felt so stupid for falling for that shit. I know better.

I've heard the stories, I should have known what to look for. I should have been looking.

Cole was the first to break the silence. "Jamie, I'm so sorry," he apologized, "I am. Bella and I's relationship was complicated, the first half of it wasn't even real. This was a publicity stunt run too long."

His words were meant to give me comfort but they did nothing but make me feel worse. "A publicity stunt run too long." I shook my head still looking out the window. "Do you even hear yourself? She cared about you, maybe even loved you, and this is how you talk about her."

"I–I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said that..." he apologized. He undid one of the buttons on his shirt. "Sometimes in this industry relationships aren't always as they seem."

"I've heard of PR relationships before, Cole." I squeezed my eyes shut. "If that's truly what it was you could have told me that, but you didn't. You lied. You've been lying to us this whole time and you've been doing it without even blinking an eye."

I put a hand to my forehead, suddenly feeling hot. "All those things you said, about coming back for me, being in love with me; you told me all of that but you couldn't manage to mention that you had a girlfriend?"

Running a hand down his face, he said, "I know I've made a huge mistake, but you have to know I meant everything I said. , and that if I could do things differently I would, I promise I would."

"That's the thing, I don't believe you." That's the issue with lying, you can never be fully trusted. And I'm not sure if I can be in a relationship with someone I can't fully trust.

"Jamie, please, everything else I've told you has been the truth."

"You think I don't want to believe that?!" I yelled. "I want nothing more than to believe that the man that I love would only ever tell me the truth, but I can't. I can't do it."

"I will never lie to you again. I swear." The handsome man that I went to the party with was nowhere to be seen, instead all I saw was a desperate man begging for forgiveness. I couldn't stand to look at him anymore.

"I don't believe you." I turned back toward the window. There was a time when Cole knew me better than anyone, so he had to have known this would never sit right with me.

The car came to a stop outside of our hotel, and I made no move to get out.

Cole grabbed my hand. "Let's go inside and talk about this some more."

I shook my head, slipping my hand out of his grasp. "No. I'm going to stay out here for a while. I need some time to think about all of this."

He opened his mouth like he wanted to protest, but thought better of it. He simply nodded and stepped out of the car. "I'll be here whenever you're ready."

The partition came down. "Where would you like to go, Ms. Anderson?" asked our driver through the now open partition.

"Just circle the block, please."