im so stressed rn im on edge
i havent been eating normally and sleeping so im gonna check in with the doctor 4 why my behavior is suddenly changing, and also tw for angst in kyle's pov. im not ok.🫠
⚠️angst based on my childhood trauma. view discretion is advised.⚠️
this chapter is dedicated to my boyfriend, aaron, who helped me through my trying times in early highschool. thanks aaron, i wouldnt be alive today if it wasn't for you.❤️
Damien: wtf is wrong w u guys.
Wendy: wtf did we do💀
Stan: frl
Damien: if u mfs bully pip one more time istg i will shove a sword up your fucking ass.
Cartman: 😀..
Craig: im surprised cartman's scared i expected him to be turned on😭
Tweek: HELP WHAT😭😭😭😭😭💀
Stan: @kyle get online
30 minutes later
Stan: omfg where is he😭
Bebe: def not listenin to u fr😒
Stan: stfu kys
Tolkien: LMAO
Cartman: stan ur a goddamn fag stfu
Stan: ur gay bec u said the f slur
Kyle: or he can just be saying the slur to be offensive like the fat diabetic dildo he is.
Stan: r u ok?
Kyle: wym im fine.
Wendy: no kyle what happened
Kyle: nothing bro.
Clyde: 😨.
Craig: kyle stop lying ur legit bullshitting so hard rn💀😭😭
Stan and Kyle: Private Messages
Stan: dude, r u ok?
Kyle: i said im fine.
Stan: kyle no u arent.. whats wrong..
Kyle: n.o.t.h.i.n.g.
Stan: dude u can tell me
Kyle: i havent slept in 3 days
Stan: why?
Kyle: i dunno.
Stan: dude you rlly need to get some rest
Stan: it's not good to be up all the time
Kyle: i cant.
Stan: but why ..
Kyle: I SAID I CANT. CAN YOU NOT BOTHER ME?
Stan: ..
Stan: srry kyle.
Kyle: its fine. i just cant rn. im tired, im starving, and i fucking hate myself and everyone.
Stan: what happened, man..
Kyle: i legit JUST told you. im STRESSED. my parents only care about my grades, and nobody FUCKING appreciates me. you dont understand how fucking hard it is to live as an outcast, sitting by themselves, being judged, looked at weird, you don't. fucking. get. it. Nobody understands, no matter HOW many ppl say they understand, they don't. nobody FUCKING includes me in anything, and all ive been doing is gaining weight. ofc my mom needs to 'joke' abt how im getting a bit fatter. now im fucking insecure, so i stopped eating. and i lost over 10 pounds in just a week. istg, ppl say the most OFFENSIVE shit to me and say 'lol im jk w u'. DO YOU THINK I LIKED MYSELF BEING UGLY WHEN THE CHART WAS UP IN THE BOY'S BATHROOM? DO YOU THINK I WANTED TO BE LAST, IF ANYTHING, EVEN CARTMAN LOOKS BETTER THEN ME? I CAN'T HANDLE PEOPLE ALWAYS STARING AT ME AND WATCHING ME WHEN I DON'T KNOW IT. I'M SCARED, STAN. I'M SCARED OF EVERYONE.
Stan: ..
Stan: Kyle, please. don't say stuff like that. you have me, and i swear i will always be here for you.❤️
Kyle: I know. Thank you Stan. but i just cant rlly take any of this anymore. i dont understand why nobody likes me. i have no clue what i did wrong.
Stan: you didnt do anything wrong, kyle. everyone sucks. ppl suck. ik. ik its hard rn, but things *will* get better.
Kyle: IVE BEEN WAITING ALL THE 8 YEARS IF MY FUCKING LIFE FOR THINGS TO GET BETTER. AND EVERYONE IS JUST THE SAME.
Stan: come over.
Kyle: no, stan.
Stan: come over to my house now. it's not a choice, it's a fucking demand.
Kyle: fine.
Third Person POV:
Kyle groaned as he get up from his seat from his gaming computer. He slipped on his jacket, and put on some slippers. Kyle yawned, opening his bedroom door, and walking downstairs. Kyle looked around to make sure his parents weren't there, in which they weren't, as usual. Kyle opened the door, as the cold winter breeze blew inside the house. Kyle shivered at the sudden temperature change, but he closed the door behind him and pulled the sides of his green ushanka, making sure the winter winds won't blow his hat away. He sprinted over to Stan's house, snow slipping into his slippers, making his feet numb. Kyle sighed, before running up the steps to Stan's house, and knocking. In a matter of seconds, Stan opened the door, and Kyle walked in, immediately plopping in Stan's couch.
"Kyle. Please. I know it's hard, especially these days when kids are really just jerks, but don't blame yourself. You know it's never your fault." Stan mumbles, closing the door behind him, as he walked over and sat next to Kyle, putting his arm over his shoulders, pulling Kyle in closely.
Kyle blushed a tiny bit, but he sighed in exhaustion. "I know. I really hate this world. It's so.. Evil, you know..?" Kyle says, looking over at Stan, laying his head on Stan's shoulder. Stan sighed, as well. "I know. But wanna know something?" Stan says, pulling Kyle in closer.
"Hm?" Kyle mumbles, sitting up, looking at Stan face to face. "You're my world." Stan says, smiling softly, as he took off Kyle's hat and ruffled up his large, fluffy ginger afro. Kyle chuckled, blushing, and it was clear to see.
"You're my world too." Kyle says, punching Stan's shoulder playfully, as Stan also chuckles. Stan took a small little action figure from his pocket. It was a hand-made paper figure of Kyle, Stan gave him it.
Kyle looked at it and smiled, giggling at the small little version of him. "It's so cute!" he beams, hugging Stan tightly, kissing his cheek. Stan chuckles, hugging Kyle back. "I made it just for you." Stan looks over at Kyle, and pats his back. Kyle smiles, as he suddenly grew tired. He hasn't slept in a while, after all, so he's been on edge for a bit. Kyle drifts asleep in Stan's arms, as Stan simply allows Kyle to sleep on him, before kissing his forehead, and turning the lamp off, leaving it in pitch darkness, as the two boys stuck together all night.
this chapter is also dedicated to my childhood friend, christopher. christopher passed away at the age of 10 due to a fatal boating accident, in which I can't explain how he died since it was gruesome, but that day i lost a very special person. chris was a really cheerful boy, and i remember playing skylanders with him for hours when it came to after school days. i love you chris, just remember i'll always remember you for making me feel special when as a kid i felt really bad. you will always be loved by me, aaron, and the many family and friends who surely miss you to this day. ily chris, i swear i will never forget abt u.
follow #kindnessforchristopher in facebook and support chris's family by doing something kind for another person, like chris has done with not only me, but with everyone else. do something good in every day, even so small, just to make chris smile from up above. everyone loves u chris.
and for all of my readers who are going through things: i am here for everyone. i might be inactive bec of work, but i still am here reading everyone's messages and doing my best to make chapters to entertain you all. its been hard recently, but things will get better for both you and me. thats a promise. ily guys.
YOU ARE READING
gay ass south park groupchat bec i have rights🤓🤓
Humoru read the title style bendy creek tyde dip bunny and all that other fun stuff is included idk how long it says for what it had taken me to make this book but it was way longer than what it says💀 warnings r offensive crap, maybe homophobia (idk🤓)...
