The Red Thread of Destiny

Chapter 26: A Night well spent

"Every night I spend with you is my new favourite."

Phayu stood in the balcony of his room at the resort, staring at the moon. A soft breeze blew around him, blowing his open hair all around his face. But he didn't even feel it. His heart was full, and his soul was content. He turned his head and looked at the softly curled form of Rain. The boy had wrapped his hands around Phayu's pillow, and was sleeping nose down into it, almost as if he was trying to snuggle into Phayu's scent. He smiled, still unable to process the events that had taken place last night. He and Rain had kissed until his brains had almost leaked out of his ears. But he had managed to pull back with what remaining brain cells he had left. Rain's innocence and his need to please Phayu, two major contradictions, had wreaked havoc on Phayu's libido and it had taken considerable effort on his part to pull away.

"Rain? What are you doing?" Phayu rested his forehead on Rain's, both of them breathing hard. "I think I am pretty clear about what I am doing Phi," he said, his warm breath hitting Phayu's lips. "We should stop. If this continues, I will not be able to control myself any longer." "Who wants you to stop Phi?" Rain asked, his voice dripping with seduction. He licked his lips, and Phayu's eyes were involuntarily drawn to them again. Phayu sighed. "Rain, you are still young, and I have made a pro..," he began. "Oh Phi, you can fuck your promise!" Rain said, heating up again at Phayu's hesitation. Phayu stared at Rain, shocked at his language, unable to believe that this was the sweet Rain he knew.

"What to do mean Rain? I can't do that. I take my promises very seriously," Phayu said. "Is that why you secluded yourself from the world? Because you had promised a dead girl you would wait for only her? Then why the hell did you approach me Phi? Why the hell did you start all this? Why did you get me involved? Why didn't you stick the promise you made to P'Amy up your fucking ass and leave me the hell alone?" Rain pushed Phayu, who stumbled backwards, unprepared for the force of his push, that was clearly fuelled by anger and desperation. But what scared and flustered Phayu more than Rain's anger and language were the tears flowing down his face.

"Rain," Phayu's voice was a broken whisper. "I am sorry Rain, I am so, so sorry baby. I..," Phayu began. "No Phi! I am tired! Tired of propping you up, tired of being your second choice, tired of being the one who gets rejected every time I try to get close to you. You say you have promised my parents, right? Phi, I am pretty sure my parents couldn't have cared less about it! What you are holding on to and not letting me get close is not the promise made to my parents, but the promise you made to P'Amy, right? Then I suggest let's just break-up, and move on. You can go back to your one-night stands, and I will go and find someone who will at least show some semblance of care for me," Rain said. He turned and started to walk away, his heart thumping crazily, needing Phayu to come and stop him.

"Rain," Phayu held his hand and swung him around. "No Rain, that's not true! You mean the world to me. My past left me the moment you walked in, and you set me free from any chains that were holding me back," he said. "It was never my intention to hurt you, and if I did that, then I am sorry, I am sorry, a million times I am sorry. I am ready to go down on my knees for you, if that will convince you." Phayu started to bend but Rain jerked him back and hugged him. Phayu clung to Rain. "I love you my baby. I only held back because I never wanted to hurt you. I never wanted you to feel that you are anything less than important to me. You are the beat of my heart, the very breath I take." Phayu cupped Rain's face.

"Then why do you push me away Phi?" Rain asked gently, understanding that Phayu was finally clearing his heart. Rain knew that, despite all his efforts to pull Phayu out of his self-imposed exile and pain, there was a corner of his heart that still was hanging on to a long-ago promise that he was just not able to let go. "Why did you let me get hurt? Do I not deserve to stand by you?" he asked, stroking his Phi's cheeks with his thumbs. "No Rain. It's not you, but it's me who doesn't deserve you. I am sorry baby. I hurt you, and no matter how many excuses I make, it will never be enough. So tell me, what can I do to convince you that you are the one for me, and I am only and forever yours?" "You can love me Phi, love me in every way you can, in every way you can," Rain said.