Have u ever felt so suffocated and done with many things but you don't know what u should really do. And sudden realisation u can't concentrate on ur test and non of the stuff u are trying to study get in ur head.
Have u ever felt so lonely when trying to move on from ur crush from past 5 yrs by talking to a guy who almost made u believe he is crazy and want and love u the most and ending up finding he had a girlfriend and I was just a joke.
Not really a new thing me being a joke for other but still trying to again move on before the thing even start is so bothering.
People believed that you are enough for the competition of life and study and u starting falling from that stairs and left with a guilt how can I meet up to the expectation people set and afraid what if I loose thus rare?
And again questioning your beauty when u have wide hips people randomly making insecure telling I am just walking like i am trying to seduce someone in general slut saming how can I even change my natural born figure and features. Telling when I smile looks like there is a injures or mark in my face . The smile meant for showing the happiness starts to become the cause of ur insecurities. Telling how I started to look old cause I am thin skined and all those insecurities making it hard to even look myself in the mirror when I just see the dark side of my beauty which maybe I could have cherished if u people would have thought thousand time before randomly commenting hoe your simple word could shatter their whole day and months.
I just wish I could be careless like a street dog sometimes maybe thats why in search of freedom my own dog whom I grew up ran away from this suffocating place after spending almost 14 yrs over here when he could barely walk.
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