One of Two // JJ Maybank

the darkest hour: one

that morning, i sat on the edge of chateau's dock, smoking a joint. i had gotten ready for john b's hearing, trying to avoid anyone at all costs. i was worried. worried for him. worried for me and sarah. worried for our group. i put the joint to my lips, slowly inhaling, then dropping it and exhaling. my hand shook rapidly as i brought it down to my knee, tapping the ashes into the water.

i scrunched my nose and sighed, leaning my back against the wood panel as i saw someone walk towards me. i didn't bother to look as i shook my head. "i don't wanna talk right now." i mumbled, putting the joint back to my mouth.

"well maybe you will if its someone specific." i looked up and saw jj sitting across from me, looking worried. i looked down and sniffled. i felt my heart beating out of my chest. "you never smoked." i shrugged, taking my words that i said seriously and not talking. "look, i know you're upset but we need to go."

i shook my head, bringing it to my knees. he leaned close to my ear. "your sister needs you." he whispered. "and i need you."

it took minutes of jj convincing me to get up and there i was, sitting in the court room, waiting for john b's hearing. the judge walked back to her seat. my leg was anxiously shaking as jj put his hand on my thigh, brushing his thumb over gently. i looked at him with tired and bloodshot eyes from crying as the judge cleared her throat. "john booker routledge, pursuant to north carolina statute section fourteen." she started. "you are charged with murder in the first degree with aggravated circumstances." i closed my eyes tightly, shaking my head. "if convicted, the maximum sentence would be the death penalty."

she hit her gavel as i sobbed, burying my face into my hands. i saw sarah's mouth wide open as she cried also. jj stood up quickly as i followed, grabbing onto his arm. "your honor, he's seventeen!" he shouted. i tugged on his arm, trying to get him to shut up.

"jj, hey-"

"he's seventeen! are you kidding?"

sarah pushed past us as she tried to get to john b, while tears streamed down her face. kie stopped her and grabbed her as we walked out of the court house heartbroken and shocked. we walked down the steps as jj intertwined his hand in mine and kie stood next to me. "is this a joke?" she asked us angrily. "are we in hell or..."

i turned to sarah who was keeping to herself as she sniffled. "we should have never came home." i said, wiping my tears from my cheeks.

jj stopped and turned to face the group. "they're gonna kill him, guys." he sighed. "i know it."

i overheard someone talking to my dad and turned my head slightly, trying to listen. "so sorry for what you and your family has gone through." the guy said. "thank god the system works."

i turned to kie who had an aggravated look on her face. "kie. kie. kie. kie." i said quickly and brought my hand to my forehead. i tried to grab her as she walked past me, standing in front of our group.

"can you please shut up?" she shouted as all the attention turned to us. i bit my lip and looked down. "of course you think the system works because it was made to protect you and people like you."

the guy turned around to face kie. "he'll have his day in court." he replied. "the jury will decide."

kie scoffed. "he shouldn't even be in court!" she shouted as she turned to my dad. "you should, because you're a murderer." i heard whispers from around us as she shouted. "you have a lot of nerve showing up to court!"

dad walked up with rose by his side and chuckled. "i know you're upset." he said calmly. "i understand, you're upset!"

kie rolled her eyes with disgust. "upset?" she retorted.

dad looked right at me and sarah, who somehow ended up next to me in front of jj. "he's got you fooled." he interrupted. "he's got you all fooled!"

i notice kie ball up her fist as she charged forward. "no, i'm not just upset!" she yelled, throwing herself at our dad but was held back by pope and shoupe. i flinched and pulled to myself, wanting to just leave and go home.

"you wanna get arrested?" shoupe shouted at us.

i scoffed as i grabbed jj's arm, holding it tightly. "hey, it's not worth it." i whispered as he glared down shoupe.

we all turned and walked the other direction ad kie turned her head slightly towards the kooks. "it's not a coincidence your daughters are sitting with us." she yelled as we all walked away.

i heard jj sigh and rub my hand while it was interlocked on his arm. i didn't dare to look back at anyone.

i sat on the porch of the chateau, watching the rain fall outside. everyone sat in silence until sarah spoke up. "me and spencer are gonna testify under oath. we were there." she said as i looked up. "we just need to get ahold of wheezie."

jj scoffed and shook his head next to me. "wheezie." he mumbled.

i looked to kie and opened my mouth slightly. "kie, do you have your phone?" i asked. she nodded and handed me her phone.

sarah nodded as i started texting. "wheezie is the only other person that knows rafe wasn't home that day." she replied. jj shook his head and pinched the bridge of his nose in frustration. "i don't know what else to do. we got you into this mess. we're gonna do our best to get us out of it."

i handed sarah kie's phone as she walked into the chateau. i sighed, rubbing my eyes. they were swollen and puffy from all the crying the last two days. i got up silently and walked to the bathroom, locking the door. i didn't feel like arguing or yelling anymore. i was so over it.

i slid down the wall and brought my knees up to my chest. i closed my eyes and tried to imagine an alternate reality where everything was normal. john b was innocent. me and jj were happy. sarah and i were happy. kie was happy. pope was happy. where everyone was happy but it just wasn't the case.

after getting myself together in the bathroom, i opened the door and walked back to the porch to see jj gone. i sigh and look to kie. "what's he up to now?" i asked.

kie shook her head. "something stupid to get john b out of prison." she replied, placing her hands on her hips. "i have to go talk to my parents, do you wanna come with? they'll be happy to see you." i nodded and opened the door to the porch, into the rain that was starting to clear up. kie walked out as i followed behind. i notice her gaze towards me. "you okay? you've been extremely quiet the last couple of days."

i shrugged, pulling my jacket cross my body and sighed. "i don't know." i answered quietly. kie looked sympathetic towards me and looked towards the road, leading to figure eight. "to be honest, i don't think anyone of us is okay."

kie wrapped an arm around me as i laid my head on her shoulder, rubbing my arm. "yeah, yeah." she agreed.