Sempiternal: • A.L.I.V.(d)E(ad)? • || BOOK 7#

20. Recurring

Unpleasant feelings are always there.

No matter what he does, no matter who talks to him or distracts him: they happen.

Jimin can feel Hajun panting in his ear. He can feel male hands sliding down his shoulders; he can feel warm liquid on his abdomen, chest, face and mouth even when there is not the slightest hint of it. Jimin can feel the stares on him. He can hear the mocking, cynical laughter.

Jimin can hear Hajun calling him female and he can feel the hand on his abdomen, caressing the area as it did for months due to the pregnancy.

Jimin can feel the baby moving inside him. How it was growing, how it was forming, how it had life and it is as if it is there again. He has resisted every urge to stick something in there. He has done everything he could to avoid it.

And Jimin wonders if it can stay that way. He wonders if this is all a very long, very elaborate and beautiful dream where he is going to end up disillusioned at the end: waking up in Hajun's nest and with it, still having the baby inside him. Waiting for the moment to leave his body and allow a new one to form.

"You are a good female, you can give many cubs."

"I don't want to have them."

"Yes you do. That's why you seduce Hajun" exposes the Alpha without taking his eyes off him. Sitting in the bath tub. "That's why you wait for Hajun. No one else touches you, because Hajun is your Alpha" he smiles wide and pleased. "My female is very good" He strokes Jimin's hair, who closes his eyes and gathers air regretfully. "He is my perfect female."

"Jimin?"

Aeyoung peeks out from the doorway. She is compelled that if she hears no noise after three minutes, she must check. Indifferent to what Jimin does. He must make noises on purpose. Whether to say he is fine or what he is doing. A check was made to make sure there's nothing remotely lethal inside the bathroom and that he doesn't carry anything like that on him.

What she finds is the Idol crying, his head leaning against the wall. She takes a couple of steps in.

"Do you need anything?" she asks quietly and Jimin shakes his head.

"No."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes."

"I can help you with whatever you need."

"It's just... you can't... help..."

Why is the bathroom full of blood?

The water's not clean.

It's blood.

He feels it drowning him from how thick it is and how hot it is. He squeezes his eyes and lips together, desperate for it to stop growing and overflowing from the tub.

With Aeyoung standing in the doorway, her whole head twisting; her hair now long, greasy and dirty sticking to her shoulders, back and collarbone; her eyes like two huge black sockets dripping blood and her mouth like a huge grin where her teeth are falling out and more of that black blood is sliding to the floor.

None of it goes away.

Why won't it go away?

~ * * * ~

Are you feeling any better?

"Quite a bit. My head isn't going to blow up like a balloon anymore and... I can contain myself a little.I think. At least that's been happening these days." mutters Jungkook who rubs his neck and shyness takes over as usual.