Death's Hold

Chapter Eleven

Aleck died one week before I did. Pneumonia.

I did not understand then why the voice began laughing the day he complained to me about a sharp pain in his chest.

We had met up as usual in front of his shack of a house. Aleck's parents were dreadfully poor you see. Poor, kind people. They were wary of me but still did not attempt to end our friendship. Aleck was their pride and joy and they saw I made him happy.

Can you believe it? Me. I actually made someone happy.

Aleck and I had a nice time as usual despite his complaints about his chest. We did not do any physical activity, we rarely did on account of the pains and aches like those of an old man I always felt. I was as weak as an old man too. No, weaker.

Aleck had never minded much and this time he was grateful for it. We simply talked. We talked about life and death.

He asked me if there was anyone I loved enough to give my life for. I told him there was no one. A huge lie but I was too shy to let him know he was the only person in the world I would give my life for a thousand times over.

Aleck nodded and I turned the question over to him. He did not hesitate. He said his parents and I told him that was very nice.

There was an awkward silence after that. Aleck and I never had awkward silences and I sought a way to break it.

In a moment of desperation, I reached out and grabbed his hand. He shivered but squeezed mine back. He told me I was as cold as the dead. I asked for a hug. He told me never to ask again and just hug him whenever I wanted to do so. I said I always wanted to. Aleck smiled a purer version of his constant smile and pulled me into a tight hug.

We hugged until he began coughing. Deep, hacking coughs that shook his body as well as mine. I gently pushed him away and saw bloody phlegm running down his mouth and into the crevice of his neck.

I yelled for his parents and they both rushed out, Aleck still coughing nonstop. Just before they bundled him into their house, he reached out and grasped my hand, his eyes brimming over and then he was gone. It happened in an instant. I had had no time to even grasp back.

He was sick for nine days before he died. I was not allowed to visit him for those nine days. I stayed in my house, staring at the burning hearth. My father gave me the usual wide berth, gouging himself and then going off to drink. He had begun soaking the pot as soon as he finished eating and I was at my thinnest yet.

My life was white static. There was no difference between me and a dead man. It was worse because I had the feelings of old with Aleck to compare to the way I now felt.

The difference was enough to drive anyone insane. I could feel myself getting colder. My numb body was a sick, whitish blue. I never looked in a mirror but my eyes felt too big on my bony face. Huge, unblinking eyes that my long hair covered easily so that I was always in a state of darkness no matter the time of the day.

Even the voice had stopped talking to me. However, on the ninth day, it told me to go over to Aleck's house. The voice never shouted, not even when I ignored it. It simply said Aleck had something to tell me and I took off running.

My father was still home and I can not imagine his shock at seeing a bedraggled, ghostly figure rushing past him, lifting the bolt, and running out of the house. He did not call out to me.

I ran to Aleck's house and knocked on the door. His mother answered and screamed. I tried to talk, to say it was just me; Aleck's best friend. I could not. My voice would not come out. I frowned in concentration and put both hands to my throat to choke it out and she screamed again.

She slammed the door on me and I heard her bolt it from the inside. My heart hit my chest painfully. Aleck had something to tell me. The voice had told me so. I had to see him. I grabbed my hair with both hands and pulled, my blue veins bulging, and hunks were torn out. I barely noticed.

I circled the shack, peering into every window till I saw Aleck's. His parents were there. I sat down on the ground, the icy snow seeping into my trousers, and waited for the sun to disappear.

Waiting was torture. I heard his parents whispered voices, his mother's muffled sobs, and a harsh cracking sound. It took a while to realize it was the sound of Aleck breathing. He was near death.

My eyes felt grainy when I finally stood and peered in through the window. Aleck was alone in the room, tucked tightly in bed. The pale moonlight illuminated his dying body and I could see his wraithlike pallor all too clearly.

A lump pushed itself into my throat.

I slid open his window, feeling horrible when the cool night air rushing in made him shiver. I leaned in as far as my head could go and whispered four words.

"Do not leave me."

His eyes were closed and his rattled breathing was shallow. I wondered if I was too late.

The voice told me then to wait for the lucidity. I did not have to wait long. A few minutes later, Aleck opened his eyes and turned to the window. Our eyes locked and I dare say I was crying.

Aleck said he was not surprised to see me. He asked me to forgive him for lying all those days ago. He said it was not only his parents he would die for if it came to that, but he also said even before his parents, he would die for me.

He saw my face and laughed uncomfortably. His laughter sounded like the sound made when scratching bark, nothing like the warm, honeyed sounds of before.

He said the reason was his parents were old but I still had my whole life ahead of me. He shook his head then and asked me to forgive him again. He said that was not the reason. The reason was simply that he loved me.

I licked my frozen lips to say it back. I was going to but when I opened my mouth, the lump was still there. I had to close my mouth and try to swallow it down. This I desperately tried to do so I could tell Aleck I loved him as well twenty-two other things.

I watched Aleck's eyes begin to lose focus, his breathing became more labored, and his constant smile dropped at the edges. I began to choke myself again in desperation, my long, dirty nails sinking in. I felt the blood on my hands.

Aleck's eyes widened. He frowned in concentration and mumbled for me not to do that.

"Do not hurt yourself" were the last words he said before he closed his eyes forever.
.
.
.
.
.
im reading the beserk manga and darn it is something else frrrrrr
anyway how do you feel about death's pov so far?
like + comment please ❤️