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☀︎NEXT DAY- I wake up to low chatter somewhere near me and a pounding headache, i think i may have gone over board with the wine. Especially being my first time. Turning over, I find Carmen's face four inches from mine, just staring, wide awake and fully unbothered by the fact that she just stared at someone sleeping in silence. Thats one of the scariest things to think about in the morning.
"Hi," she giggled innocently climbing on me now. I blink at her for a second not properly awake so she grabs my nose and that's that, my morning has started whether I want it to or not.
I reach for my phone mostly out of habit and almost drop it when the notifications load. A bajjilion missed calls, trillion texts, all Lev, all of them sent after midnight, the calls going from 1:04 all the way to 2:17 in the morning like he sat somewhere and just kept trying over and over.
I read the texts sitting up in bed with Carmen warm and squirming in my lap. I read them twice slowly. He's apologizing and not the lazy kind, not the two-line kind, he's actually saying something, explaining that something came up and he couldn't reach me cause of smtg with signal and by the time he could it was too late and he's sorry, genuinely, and he wants to talk.
I put the phone down and just sit there for a minute. I'm not doing this over text or over the phone. Whatever he has to say I want to hear it from his actual mouth in an actual room so I can look at his face while he says it. I trust myself more in person, over text I'd either say too much, say nothing or say something I regret. Or all tbh.
"Good Morning Angelita," I mumble to Carmen, forcing myself out of bed. I would kiss her and talk properly but morning breath is a thing. Luckily, I woke up an hour too early which is great cause I can go see Lev for the answers I need, thats the least he could do after leaving me in the cold i feel like. But I need the gym first well the bathroom but u get it.
After brushing my teeth, showering and putting on some of Nessa's gym clothes, I pick up Carmen who's right in the middle of the fluffy blanket.
"Let's go, Angelita" We head downstairs to the kitchen.
"Good morning," I greet Nessa putting Carmen in her booster chair.
"Hey pretty," I smile and thank her when she puts oatmeal in front of me. I look at her outfit and smile again she knew I was gonna work out before I did anything else which explains the oatmeal. We eat then this random lady, I think she's a sitter, comes for Carmen so me and Nessa leave.
We walk to the closest gym to Vanessa's place, on the way there, I tell her everything, the texts, what they said, that I'm going over there after, that I'm just going to listen and decide from there what I want to do. She listens and doesn't say much except that she'll be there with me the entire way.
I text Kendall from the gym while I'm stretching and just tell her I might need to talk later. She texts back fast and says to call her whenever im ready and she'll be waiting. I don't even bother with Hala, I have her blocked on everything. I put my phone away and get into it.
