Aleksei & Liam

43. Mum

(Aleksei's PoV)

"Who are you going as for the Halloween party?"

"A rockstar."

"...but you're always dressed like one."

"Makes things easier, innit?"

Cheryl sighed, "suit yourself."

I didn't want to go to the party, I didn't want to be anywhere near Liam and Alex being all handsy and all lovey.

Revolting.

Heart wrenching.

"I'll see you later!" Cheryl placed a kiss to my cheek and began walking away.

"Where are you going?"

She gave me a look, "having lunch with my friends?"

I simply nodded.

Guess I was going to spend lunch in hemp haven (the place under the bleachers, remember?)

I made my way through the narrow halls, out of the building and under the bleachers. No sign of any of the guys.

Huh, would you look at that. Friendless.

I sat outside and stared at the field with the football team running around per usual, Liam was there and he was looking hotter than ever.

I caught Charlie's eyes and he sent me a wave and subtly motioned to Liam, I bit my lips to hide my forming smile and ran my hands through my hair, dragging them down my face.

Simp.

I pulled out my phone and stuck my earbuds in, throwing one of my playlists on shuffle and leaning into the metal...or whatever this was made of.

Would it be considered cheating if I fanaticised about Liam doing me behind the bleachers?

If you knew me you'd know that I was an inconsiderate bastard whose guilty conscious simply did not exist.

As my thoughts got spicier, I sensed someone take a seat next to me, looking over, it was him.
"Can I uh, sit here?" Liam asked.

He was slightly out of breath with skin that glistened in the sunlight, he was red in the face and the neck and his strong arms and legs were on full display making my heart go haywire.

I nodded and looked ahead, calmly even though there was a war inside.

"Where are the others?"

I shrugged.

We sat in silence and my heart hammered against my chest, he was my crush after all.
I hadn't full come to terms with my sexuality and I didn't really care for labels so things weren't that bad.

"Reminds me of the other day." I said in a small voice as a smile formed on my face.

"Hm?" Liam asked as he sent me a fleeting glance before his eyes focused on the field.

"The day I gave you my number." I chuckled, "and you took over a week to text me."

He looked at me with his radiant smile and sent out a soft laugh of his own, "I was overthinking the entire time." He chuckled and shook his head.

"I thought you had a change of heart or something." I replied

"I could never." He was barely audible but I heard him and it made me melt just a little.

I scooted a bit closer to him, it was probably a bad idea but I didn't care. I wanted to be near him.

"Don't hesitate when it comes to me." Was I flirting? Maybe.

He looked at me for the briefest of moments before looking away, gulping and retrieving his free hand that was almost touching my thigh. It made me frown but I was delusionally hopeful that he would give in.

He chuckled nervously, "uh, I'll be heading back. Just wanted to see if everything was fine."

"Liam?" I called out.

He turned back to face me with a curious look.

"Are we friends?"

It felt like ages before he replied, "I'm sorry, you know how things have been lately..."

"Don't say that." I pleaded

He cast his eyes down to the ground not knowing what to say or do.

"Why do you care so much? Why did you come up to me?" I added

"We are." He nodded curtly.

"Then act like it! Why are you avoiding me?"

"Because you know what happens when we're around each other." His tone was a bit more aggressive  but his eyes were still gentle, still so kind, like he didn't wish to hurt me, like he still loved me.

"We're happy." I looked at my fidgety fingers, I meant it, when I was with him I was happy but that was all I could let him in on.

When I looked at him, his features had softened, his eyes sad and on the verge of tearing up.

"Mistakes. We make mistakes when we're around each other." He said, putting on a stony expression before walking away.

•••

I was in a mood yet again, when I made it home from school I went straight into the living room, sitting myself at the piano as Stu circled around my legs. Stupid cat.

"Aleskei?" My mother walked into the room with a kitchen towel in her hand, "what's wrong?" She asked once she saw my miserable state.

"Nothing." I said as I lifted my head from the keys and turned to face the other side, replanting my face onto the keys making a grim noise.

"Doesn't seem like nothing." My mother cringed at the noise.

I groaned animalistically, one thing I loved about my mother
Was that she was very understanding...and very lenient.

She walked to me and placed a hand on my back, "hang out with your friends for a while, it'll cheer you up."

"Haven't got any." I said apathetically.

"Oh! Come off it, what about that little friend of yours? Alfie?"

That was the first time she got Alfie's name right.

"Yeah, no. We're not all that close."

"What about that sweet boy who's always keeping little Stu entertained." She chuckled.

"Apparently we're a mistake." I said matter-of-factly.

"A bit dramatic, isnt it?" She asked with a laugh but when she saw that I wasn't laughing, she stopped as well.

"You're being serious?"

"I don't know why I push everyone away." I said with another groan. My mother pulled me into a hug from behind and I just let her hug me.

"Now, that may not be true."

"But it is! First Alfie, then Liam and I'm pretty sure Cheryl's gonna dump me as well."

"Cheryl?" My mother pulled back and looked at me in surprise.

"Oh, yeah I have a girlfriend."

"Oh!" My mother said awkwardly, "I didn't think you..." she gestured with her hands.

"Never mind! Have her over someday I'd love to meet her!" She said cheerfully and I groaned.