What The People Don't See

I Need To Be Your Only

Breakfast swept past in a blur of laughter, inside jokes (which were all kindly explained to El and I), and hilarious previous tour experiences. El was constantly nagging at Josh to tell her the inspiration for each song that he wrote (apparently he was the main songwriter) and sulked whenever he told her that it didn't matter; it was the music that counted.
Between interesting conversation with Evan, who was sitting across from me, and the odd awkward smile exchange with Ross, I would catch Josh's eye. Every time this happened, I quickly glanced away, feeling an uncomfortable heat scratching up my neck. I knew without a doubt that he remembered our little 'dmc', as Eloise would've called it, from the night before. I sometimes caught him gazing at the bruise that was blossoming across my right shoulder from where I'd hit it when he scared me. Whenever you catch someone staring at you, it's usually expected that they'll quickly look away out of embarrassment. Not Josh; he just smiled at me and gave me an innocent shrug.

He wasn't the only one to notice the bruise. Ross almost stumbled off the footpath on the way to Maccy D's when he spotted it beneath the coat he'd lent me. It took me three streets to assure him that I'd only just walked into the door and that no one had attacked me with a hammer. It annoyed me whenever people made a fuss, there seriously was no need for it. But Ross asking if my shoulder was okay and if my foot was feeling better made me grin like a fool. I liked it so much, I was almost tempted to walk into a streetlamp on the way. Almost.

"Hey, hey Eloise, watch this!"

Pete gave the signal to Evan to toss a few skittles in his direction and he caught them all on his tongue, without even having to move his head. I cheered but El just raised her eyebrows before turning back to Josh. Pete's head drooped slightly and my heart ached in my chest, knowing exactly what it felt like to be ignored by the person you like. Before I could change my mind and force myself to remain cool and look like I didn't give a shit, I hopped up onto the back of the booth and shimmied along the ledge, grabbing Pete's hand as I did.

"Come on, McFlurry time on me."

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"There are rules for what you shouldn't eat before 12 O' clock in the day, and I think one of them is definitely to avoid ice cream..."

We were making our way back to the venue so that Eloise and I could find where we parked the car. Ross and I had taken a little detour when I suddenly remembered Toby's precious crunchies and once inside the newsagents, I decided to stock up on some penny sweets, candy fags and dip-dabs too. I asked Ross if he wanted anything and he chose an apple chubba chub. He bit of the wrapper and started to suck on it the minute we were outside and I told him that lollipops before twelve were just as bad as icecream. To which he just shrugged. I looked down at my candy ciggies and wished more than anything that they could turn into real ones. I desperately needed a smoke.

The McFlurry had given me serious brain freeze. At least it had occupied Pete for a little while. We hadn't had enough for two so we shared one, taking turns to lick the spoon, giving out to each other whenever we took more than one lick. Josh couldn't stop laughing at us, saying we looked like "wild animals". Eloise was quick to agree, throwing us a look of distaste before rushing after him in her heels. I thought she looked like a chihuahua and turned to tell Pete. He laughed but still looked a bit miserable.

"So what were you doing in the park that night?" Ross asked. The question was so forward and out of the blue that I didn't even have the time to think of whether or not to lie.

"I was just walking home from my boyfriend's house. I like cutting through the park, it's always more calm there."

"You have a boyfriend?"