𝐑𝐞𝐦𝐞𝐦𝐛𝐞𝐫 𝐌𝐞

𝟎𝟔| 𝐂𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐔𝐑𝐈𝐄𝐒 𝐀𝐆𝐎

𝐒𝐨𝐧𝐠 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫- 𝐇𝐞𝐚𝐯𝐞𝐧𝐥𝐲 𝐛𝐲 𝐂𝐢𝐠𝐚𝐫𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐬 𝐀𝐟𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐒𝐞𝐱

•𝐄𝐝𝐞𝐧-𝐈𝐯𝐞𝐫•

The sun has set and the emptiness has kicked in. Absolute numbness encases my body as I stare into the night through the curtains of the locked balcony doors. I've been kept in here since trying to plummet to my death this morning. But that's not actually what I was trying to do, I just wanted to wake up.

Though, I don't think I ever will. Maybe it'll be good to stay in this dream forever, I always prayed that God would wake me up while at my previous home. I've never really believed it was my home, it was somewhere that I'd spend all my time but still feel homesick. Have I woken up?

It this what being awake actually is? I don't think so, the lack of emotion in my body tells me so.

After the two men locked me in here earlier, I spiraled into a panic attack. I paced my room for three hours with my hands in fists and heart in my throat. My feet had a cold numb feeling and I felt on the urge of passing out from holding my breath. The pounding in my chest felt like it was going to kill me.

But I survived, like I always do. And I was rewarded with perfect numbness. Perhaps being this way isn't a curse like I always thought it was, instead a blessing so that I do not have to feel like others do.

I am snapped out of my thoughts by a knock on the door, the room gains a bit of light when it's cracked open. I had realized earlier through my pacing that there seems to be no electricity here, only candle light. And well, I was locked in here while the sun was still out and no use to light any.

"Oh dear," Vincent mutters. "I hadn't realized you had no light in here." He marches in followed by Hades. Vincent takes a box of matches out of his suit jacket pocket and begins to light various candles around the room, giving it a soft warm glow. Having them in here makes me feel like I'm suffocating while at the same time being able to breathe clearly since they left.

"What do you guys want?" I ask, turning back to the window and staring out.

"We would you to accompany us to dinner in the dinning hall," Vincent tells me.

I look down at my body that is covered in a white cotton night gown is distaste. I can feel my thighs rubbing together and my stomach sits uncomfortably on my body. "Not hungry," I mumble wanting nothing more than for them to never bring up the subject of food again. It makes me feel sick talking about it, yes of course I eat. My lack of a thigh gap proves so. But I don't want to, I never want to, I lose control sometimes though. That's how I ended up as the friend that wasn't necessarily plus sized, but definitely bigger than everyone in the friend group making them all look stunning and skinny compared to me. My brother used to tease me about my eating habits... so did my parents.