Him❤️

Love

November 4, 2023

I fell in love once.
I fell in love once, and I've never been the same. I honestly think he could be the one. I can't believe I fell in love once, one actual time and he changed me. He redefined in every fiber of what I thought love was. He continues to change me. I have found that he constantly and continuously consistently stirs up a flurry of emotions inside of me.

I yearn for him.
I adore him.

I love his laugh.
I love his smile.
I love his crumby jokes, even if they end up not being the best because no matter what they still make me smile.
I genuinely love this boy. I will never leave or intentionally try to harm him in anyway.

I think for me to leave him he would have to shatter my very soul, my very being; he would have to rip my heart out of my chest, tear it to pieces, shred it into immensely smaller fractions if it's being, douse it into acid of the highest acidity, and then and only then burn it into a pile of ashes.

I do not know how to express to the extent in which I love this boy.

And yet...

He makes me question my every being. He sets my soul a flame. He rivals my every word and at times counters every opinion to cross my mind or fall from my lips.

This boy annoys me. He forgets easily and sometimes we joke about it together and call him "Dory". He can piss me off and make me smile all in under two seconds. He can say things that absolutely confuse me and knock the breathe out of my windpipes like I was just pushed in front of an oncoming train.

The love we share is chaos in every aspect, way, shape, or form. It's chaos at its very being. I love him. I love him through it all. I love him through the good and bad and through the stress and the tears. I truly love this boy.

He puts up with so much. He is one of the strongest people I ever know. He's vulnerable, he shares his opinion, he's stubborn, he's kind, he's funny, he's sweet, and sometimes he's a hot head.
He's mine.

The love we create together is messy. It's puzzling. It hurts and it heals. It's peaceful and overstimulating.