cascade | kotlc

19. Into Sight

- F. V.

Could he ever forgive himself?

He probably couldn't, and June looked so disastrously innocent, every vein and artery bulged and his heart was pumping blood. And the wind was finally blowing again.

As much as he despised it, he had come to terms with his inevitable fall. It would happen. Whether, however, it was the next day, next week, next year, or next millenia; if he died miserable, content, or forgotten; if June had to see him die, if she had to suffer his loss -- it was his to control.

Fate could only outline so much of his decisions, and he was determined to live his life to the fullest. He would embrace his destiny.

But there was only so much he could do, too, he thought. I wish I could tell you, he transmitted to the wailing weeds as he turned to June and the vial in her hands. Labeled PRESERVE.

A tear shed from his eye, and he dried it before June could notice. What he would do if he could truly preserve everything he had...

Time was such an atrocity. Once he had wondered how awesome it would be to peer into your own future, to know exactly what would happen and when. Now, he was just thankful he didn't know the when.

"Hey, Fitz?" June whispered softly beside him. "Was that it?"

He stirred. "Was what it?"

"I mean, did you take me here just to show me the emergency override? Or..." Her lips curled into a smirk. "Was there more to it?"

"Oh... yes. Um, of course..."

There was so much bitterness hidden behind his voice, he was surprised June didn't notice. Or perhaps she did notice, and was doing all she could to pretend she couldn't, deny that anything was wrong with him.

"This is a nice place to kiss you," he mumbled, his words barely leaving his throat, filled with so much saliva and hoarseness. June only smiled at that, coming closer, her steps light and delicate.

Her hand slid over his shoulder, and she stood on her tiptoes so that their lips were on matching levels.

Fitz shut his eyes, preparing for the kiss. June went in.

Her lips were butter-soft, like they always were, and Fitz could taste her breath in his face, that aroma of the cool spring breeze and the wafting of gentle honeysuckle. Her lashes fluttered, a butterfly expanding its tender wings, and Fitz was dimly aware of the draft sweeping over him.

Defiantly he pressed his lips tighter onto June's, his heart imploding in a cacophony of joy and desperation and determination, racing, racing. Pounding like rocks in a rockslide, whirling like sand in a sandstorm, neverending like the circling wind.

He had never truly appreciated how wonderful it was to have June. He was a lucky man to be blessed with her existence, and her love.

Subtle breaths to maintain the kiss, and he was inhaling more of June's scent as she adjusted her posture and went in deep again.

If I should stay

It was June's Imparter, that ringtone he had familiarized himself with over at least three years now. He knew exactly what the title of the song was. It was human, June had said: she had chosen it 'quite arbitrarily, but it sounded nice.' It was when she didn't understand English yet, but Fitz knew the meaning of every word.

I would only be in your way

June groaned, softly, and she broke off finally, stepping back and wiping her lips. Her eyes shone in hungry satisfaction.