Today's little adventure is gonna be a bit of an eye opener, literally speaking, since our dear Y/n started his day as he usually does, with a headache.
The sudden rumble of things being ripped apart on the floor below caused our not-so small imp to do what any sensible person would after being woken up.
Y/n: *Rubbing his eyes while waving his gun around.* Someone better be bleeding or else someone will be!
As Y/n finally stopped rubbing his eyes, he saw what constituted as homewreckers... Literally, they're constraction workers.
Construction chief demon: Aight boys, we got 6 hours to rip this place apart, so let's not dally.
Seeing the construction demons tear the bar apart, by legitimately just taking whatever they can find and smashing it to pieces, caused our big imp to approach the bigger bar owner.
Y/n: So I'm guessing we're cleaning house?
Timothy: *Pulls a flatboard from somewhere and proceeds to write on it* "Can't afford to keep this place going, so I'm doing what any respectful business man would do."
Y/n: Ah... Burning-man?
Timothy: *Writing on the flatboard again* Burning-man!
For those wondering, Burning man or the "Burning man method" is a philosphy based around taking an establishment that's up the creek in taxes and debts, and proceeding to burn down the establishment in order to piss off whoever is gonna take it.
But as interesting as the burning man method is, Y/n's train of thought switched to someplace else as he heard something that annoyed him to an extreme extent.
Y/n: *Hears a certain song being played from a construction radio* ... *Shoots the radio, making it explode* Hate that f**king song.
Bit of an excessive way of handling something you don't like, I'm sure, but behind every action lies a reason... That I won't go into right now because Y/n has work that needs doing, and I suck at explaining symbolism.
Y/n: Aight, I'm heading out. Try not to burn the place down before I get back.
Timothy didn't really write anything, as he instead just patted Y/n on the back as he left.
And as Y/n went to meet up at the I.M.P. office and go about business as usual. Somewhere, up in the living world. Two mysterious suits in a dark room were watching numerous footage of the jobs done by our very own I.M.P.
Male suit: *Points to a screen with Blitzø... acting like Blitzø* Right there! This was the first sighting.
Female suit: They are definitely from Hell. They must use some dark magic to cross over into our world... and they seem to be killing specifically targeted people. But why?
Male suit: *Speaks in a very obvious "Boston" accent* They always attack at random, aaaall over the country. There's no way to predict where they'll show up next-
And just like that convenient and rowdy background noise that can only be caused by our lovable imps, just occured outside the undisclosed location of the agents... Also, did I mention this was more of a fast-foreward than a "meanwhile" situation? No? Eh, f**k it.
Female suit: *Checks outside, and sees Blitzø doing... Blitzø things* Ahhh, well... That's convenient.
It sure is, let's focus on that, and not my past mistakes.
While the two suit watched the outside, our professional imp hitmen were doing what they always do... Dumping bodies.
Y/n: *Dumping one body in a dumpster* That's one... *Dumps another body in the dumpster* Aaaand, that's two... Okay, that's it.
Blitzø: *Stands on top of the dumpster* Way to go, Cheesy. Now remember people... Shhh, we can't be seen!
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Helluva Hitman ( Helluva Boss x Male Reader )
FanfictionSo imagine this. Y/n, a multinational hitman working for numerous agencies, finally finds himself dead and unsurprisingly in hell. Which leaves him with two choices. One. Finally, get that retirement he always expected. Or two. Getting back on the...
