Middle Child Syndrome- Ian Gallagher

a secret for a secret

I hated to admit it, but Chicago wasn't half as bad as I thought. Yea, the neighborhood sucked, but having the Gallaghers as neighbors made it so much better. I also met our other neighbors, Kev and V, and they seemed nice. 

One night, while Persephone had one of her stupid Disney shows on and invited Debbie over, someone knocked on the door. 

I opened it, and there was Ian, holding a pack of cigs. We went out on the porch and lit one for each of us.

"I feel like you'd be fun to get high with, Athena," Ian said.

I shook my head, "Nah, I can't smoke weed."

"Why not?"

"Long long story," I said.

Ian threw his hands up, "I have nowhere else to be. Try me."

"It's hella traumatic. I don't want to put that on you," I said. 

Ian scoffed, "Trust me. I'm sure I can handle it."

"Ok," I said, flicking the end of my cig, "Only if you tell me about Kash first. He's gone, so it doesn't matter what I know." 

I watched as Ian finished his cigarette, sighed, and rubbed his head. 

"Alright. Don't say I didn't warn you."

I raised an eyebrow. 

"So, I'm bisexual," he said, "I've liked guys for as long as I can remember. And uh, one day, Kash and I hooked up, and it became a normal thing."

My jaw dropped to the floor. I wanted to say so many things.

"What?"

"Dude, that's like majorly fucked up," I said.

"I know. I know, he's married, and-

"No, not that! You're what, 16? And he's what, 30s, 40s? How old were you when it started?"

"Fifteen," Ian said, "Old enough to know what I was doing. And I consented."

My eyes widened because I couldn't believe the words that were coming out of this man's mouth.

"Ian, you realize that as a minor, you cannot legally consent to anything with an adult, even if you say you do. It's the law," I said, "It's the same thing if I was boning a forty-year-old, but I said oh, I went after him, so it's fine."

"Yeah, whatever," he said, "Well, a deal's a deal. So, tell me, Athena Johnson. Why can't you smoke weed?"

I sighed and took a deep breath, "At the beginning of freshman year, I started dating this boy Connor. At first, it was great. I liked him, and I thought he liked me. Then, it started going downhill around January. We'd always go to these parties, and at first, it was just drinking and smoking. And then, it got to the hard stuff, like cocaine, and meth, and pills. Snorting cocaine became like secondhand nature to me around March. I barely slept, I barely ate. I don't even know how I passed that year of high school. By April, Connor and I snorted cocaine and meth and swallowed pills even on school nights. I'd come to school hungover and high all the time, and my parents and teachers started to notice. What got me sent to the principal's office was the morning after I took Molly. It was the worst experience of my life, and I'm pretty sure Connor spiked it because I still hallucinate."

"I- I'm so sorry."

I shook my head and laughed, "Oh, I'm not even finished."

"When the last day of school was over, I came home, and my parents were there with two men. Men who worked at a rehabilitation center. They took me, and I just screamed and cried and begged my parents to not do this."

I started tearing up at the flashback of me screaming my throat raw, "MOM! DAD! PLEASE! DON'T DO THIS! PLEASE! I'M SORRY!"

Ian was speechless.

"My mom was sobbing as I drove away. Thank god Persephone didn't see all that. I was in rehab for a month. It was the hardest and most painful month of my life, but it's over. I've been clean for a year from pills, coke, and meth, and six months clean from weed."

I slowly wiped my eyes, careful so as not to ruin my mascara. 

"Jesus," Ian said, "I'm sorry. I don't know what to say."

"You don't have to say anything," I said, "Like I said, it's a lot. But yeah, I can't smoke weed anymore. Because every time I do, I feel the urge to go back to harder stuff."

"I understand," he said, "Is your family holding up ok?"

I shrugged, "Troy's indifferent, or at least he acts like it. Persephone still doesn't know about any of it. She thinks I went to sleep away camp for a month. My mom still blames herself and deals with it by drinking, and my dad? I knew I was his least favorite already, but ever since I came home, it's like he doesn't even want me to exist."

"Yup, I feel you there," Ian said, "Although, Frank isn't my dad, anyway."

I turned and looked at him, "What do you mean?"

"So, last year, Monica came back momentarily because she and her girlfriend, Bob, wanted to take Liam, and they took a DNA test to prove that Frank wasn't the father, but the funny thing is, Liam is Frank's."

My jaw dropped, "There's no way. Liam? The black baby?"

He chuckled, "Yep. So, uh, Lip and I decided to take a DNA test too on the off chance that we're not Frank's. And uh, we found out that I'm not Frank's son. The results said that he wasn't my father, but that my father was a close relative, probably one of his brothers. And by narrowing it down, we tracked down Frank's brother, Clayton."

"Do you still talk to him?"

He shook his head, "Nope. I may have a fucked up life, and my siblings might be my cousins, but they're still my family, and I can't leave them."

I nodded before looking at Ian, "Man, you Gallaghers."

Just as I finished my sentence, Troy came walking down the street with his arm around some blonde chick with massive boobs.

"Athena, Ian," Troy slurred before opening the door and closing it. My brother is such a slut. 

We both looked at each other.

"Man, you Johnsons," Ian said. 

I couldn't even say anything. All I could do was laugh, and we both just sat there. Laughing.