Hi. I know being a teenager is supposed to be a rollercoaster, but I don't think I'm on the same ride. I mean I know I'm not. On top of all the things that my body doesn't know how to do I'm like 99.9% sure I'm bipolar. My mom and my brother are, plus I've done obsessive research on it and I'm just check check checking all those boxes.
I kinda hate myself right now. And I just want to sleep until it all gets better, but I might just be better off dead. I got in a right with my mom and haven't spoken to her in like 3 hours, and part of me wants to stop and knows I'm wrong here but the other part also knows I'm right. And I am right, but I'm also wrong. But what does it matter because I'm probably going to kill myself anyway. I what kind of parent knows they could do something so their child has one less way to be bullied on a pile of so many ways and doesn't do it. I am almost 15 and have to use a burner phone to write this because of my dumbass of a brother watching porn in 6th grade and now the rest of us can't get a phone until 10th.
My parents wonder why I never share what I'm into but then when I do they make fun of it. What sick bastard takes the one thing that makes me feel human and makes fun of it. But it's all better when you buy fucking ice cream and hair dye. Who takes the one thing that makes me fit in with kids on some level and makes it a joke but its all fine because you took me to tue doctor and got a fucking x ray that's not going to show anything because they never do! Who!? I fucking dare you to tell me a person who does this and doesn't end up with their child hating them!
Whatever though I'm probably just victimizing myself.
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My Diary For Bored Ppl
RandomBc I feel like it, read into my innermost thoughts. Its like the title says, a public diary. See the life of a mentally ill trans kid in the rural south.
