The E-book of Random Crap

Summer... :):

So summer is finally here. I've graduated middle school. Eighth grade has been my worst academic year as well as my most stressful year, but I can't say I hated it because it has also been the year in which I absolutely loved all of my teachers and was in the best friend group ever. It's kinda left me emotionally drained. I thought I would be so happy to be out of school as well as super sad to leave all of my amazing friends behind (for literally everyone in my friend group is going to a different high school than I am). I was sure that all of the stress was just gonna be lifted off of my shoulders. I was also sure that I was gonna be extremely devastated about leaving and cry waterfalls on graduation. But for some reason, I don't really feel anything. The generally bad feelings that came with school have not left. I didn't cry a single tear during or after the moving up ceremony. I'm hoping that it just hasn't set in yet, the fact that I'm leaving most of the people that I've known for the last nine years of my life, and that school as I know it is done and over with, in both the good and bad ways. I'm hoping that those facts will set in soon. Because the alternative is me having this dull empty feeling inside of me all summer long. I'd rather feel some form of emotions than none at all, even if it's stinging pain and sadness. I've delt with this emptiness pretty much the whole school year, and I wish it would just pass like middle school has. I want to have a good and happy summer where I go out to movies and to the beach and pool parties and keep in touch with all of my friends. I want to have the summer of a lifetime that I won't ever forget. I don't want these depressing feelings to take that away from me. I want my life back.