ENG - My best friend's sister ᵐᶦᵏᵉʸ ˣ ᵒᶜ

82

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I walk home with heavy steps, although I really want to avoid returning there so quickly and coming face to face with my brother. I don't need to think about how he will look at me or scold me at the moment.
But where else am I supposed to go? Kei still wants to see Chifuyu, so I'm definitely not going to disturb them. I immediately discard the idea of going to Emma's - it's simply not an option. And my relationship with Hina isn't close enough for me to turn up at her place unannounced in the middle of the night. That's it as far as my acquaintances are concerned, so I have no other choice and I don't have enough money in my pocket for a hotel.
I risk a cursory glance over my shoulder, only to realize that he's not actually following me. There is no sign of him in the darkness. No wonder, why should he? Running after me, desperately dropping to your knees and begging for forgiveness only happens in cheesy love stories. And I'm not in one of those.
I wipe the tears from my face with shaky fingers and continue on my way home. An icy shiver runs through me as I slowly realize the painful truth - it's over.

When I finally reach my front door, I don't even bother to be quiet and make sure I don't wake my brother. I throw my key carelessly onto the shelf, kick my shoes against the wall and disappear into my room with a loud slam of the door. The anger and pain inside me are boiling and I can no longer think clearly. I throw myself onto my bed and pull the covers over my head as if to shut out the outside world.
Shortly afterwards, I hear a soft knock on my door, but I don't answer it. I'm still angry with my brother, even if that's not really a priority at the moment.
Since I don't respond, he opens the door quietly and enters my room with a quietly concerned: "Meiyo?" I don't feel like talking, let alone seeing him. With tears in my eyes, I straighten up and throw my pillow in his direction.
"Get out," I force out in a quivering voice. "I don't feel like talking to you or listening to you yell at me." As I fling my second pillow at him, the tears continue to stream down my face. All I want right now is to be alone and just bawl my eyes out.

But my brother sees things differently. He comes towards me and sits down on the edge of the bed. "I'm sorry," he whispers quietly and looks at me. I'm too stubborn to look away, so we look at each other. The tears in my eyes and the darkness, lit only by the pale light of the street lamp outside, make it a little more difficult, though. "Emma gave me a good talking to and I realize I overreacted. If I'm honest, I probably did worse things when I was your age. Going to a club and drinking a bit too much are really harmless in comparison, I think," he continues after he realizes I'm not answering.
"You're all grown up now, but it's hard for me to accept that you're not the little girl you used to be," he continues, still maintaining eye contact. And no matter what he says, it doesn't make things better, it just makes them worse. My insides are already a mess and my emotions are going crazy because of everything that's happened in the last few hours.

"I'm still not going to stop worrying! So stop jumping out of the window, you crazy one," he adds with a slight smile and tousles my hair. A faint smile flits across my lips, but fades as quickly as it appears. "But promise me you'll come to me if anything happens, okay? I'll also try not to get mad, even if you suddenly show up with a guy," he presses out the last sentence heavily. "Be glad I don't have a pillow to press against your face anymore," I mumble quietly and just lie down. He laughs again and gets up to leave the room. I whisper a quiet: "I'm sorry too" after him.
I should actually be glad that things with my brother are easier than I thought. But what Kei has revealed to me makes it all the more difficult for me to come to terms with it, especially as I get confirmation that all this gang crap is more important to him than me. Racking my brains over the last few hours, I eventually fall asleep.

The rest of the days go better than I expected. I haven't seen Mikey since that one evening and haven't contacted him, nor has he contacted me. Nevertheless, every ring of my cell phone makes my heart beat faster in the hope that it might be a message from him. Instead, I spend every day with Kei and Chifuyu, as he is just as reluctant to part with him as I am.
It's amazing how well Chifuyu and I get along, despite the stupid comments he's made in the past. But as it turns out, those comments are just his jealousy. I know Kei likes men and he also told me once that he has something going on with Chifuyu but they are not together.

I also finally found the opportunity to talk to my brother in peace until I ended up crying in his arms. We agree that he will treat me like an adult from now on and that I should stop being as stubborn as a defiant child.
The realization that he is involved in a gang hits me hard, but he is still my brother, whom I love dearly. Magically, our bond suddenly seems much stronger and more intimate than ever before.

[...]

"And you're absolutely sure you want to do this?" my best friend asks as he looks at me urgently in the mirror. I can feel my hands shaking slightly, but I nod resolutely.
"Absolutely," I try to say confidently as I place the scissors at shoulder height. A deep breath and then I cut off my hair. Chifuyu, who is standing in the bathroom with Kei and me, draws in a sharp breath and stares at the floor in shock as the strands fall to the ground.
I myself swallow hard after holding my cut hair in my hand and looking at myself in the mirror. My hair, which normally reaches my belly button, is now reduced to shoulder length. The contrast between the two hair lengths feels strangely frightening. Nevertheless, I don't hesitate for long and take the scissors to the other side to cut off my hair there too.

A little proud that I've actually done this, I turn to the two boys and hold up my cut hair like a trophy.
"Give me the scissors, something needs to be fixed, it's completely crooked," Chifuyu grumbles lightly, grabbing the scissors and moving me onto the toilet seat to sit down. "I always cut Baji's hair too, I can do it. So trust me," he grins at me and starts to cut my hair to length.
Keikei, who has only stood silently by and watched, shakes his head in disbelief. "Stop just looking and make yourself useful, shake the color!", I scold playfully, pointing at the hair color.
"That's crazy. What kind of trip are you on right now that you're doing something like this?" he asks me, but obeys anyway and starts to mix the hair dye after studying the instructions.
"You know that," I mumble quietly, getting a little sad again. I tell Kei that I broke up with Mikey that very evening. He's relieved, of course, but it's hard for him to see how much the break-up is affecting me. That's why he fulfills almost my every wish, including cutting and dying my hair.

After Chifuyu rescues my hair, my best friend bravely begins the task of smearing the black dye on my head. Kei, with a skeptical look that won't go away, mutters repeatedly, "This is crazy." The two boys are visibly overwhelmed and seem to think they're doing something wrong, which is all the more amusing for me. After more than half an hour, they are finally finished and when I look at myself in the mirror, I see that even half my face is colored. As I turn to them to complain, I see what the two of them look like themselves.
Kei's hands are as black as night, his arms are covered in countless black spots, and there are also some spots on his face, however they got there. He can probably say goodbye to his clothes too. Even Chifuyu, who was actually just standing by, now has stains on his arms and clothes.
"Why didn't you use gloves?" I ask, trying to suppress a laugh.
"There were gloves?" Kei asks, confused. Chifuyu and I burst out laughing, which intensifies as we all look at each other.

In that moment, I can forget the heartache of the last few days for a moment and I'm just happy.

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